


the art of fire

by iamertrash



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Artist Steve Rogers, Background Het, Bucky Barnes Cooks, Children, Christmas Eve, Christmas Fluff, Firefighter Bucky Barnes, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, I Don't Even Know, I think?, Injury, Injury Recovery, M/M, Modern Era, Past Steve Rogers/Sam Wilson, Pining, Post-Serum Steve Rogers, Primary School, Sam Wilson is a Saint, Smut, Steve Rogers & Sam Wilson Friendship, Teacher Steve Rogers, bucky's family - Freeform, i hardly remember anything about this fic dude, i love u sam smooch, sorry :/ - Freeform, steve and bucky are fathers, they go to disneyworld at one point
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-07
Updated: 2018-10-07
Packaged: 2019-07-27 21:08:28
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 24,928
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16227359
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iamertrash/pseuds/iamertrash
Summary: Steve and Bucky are both single fathers, and their children become best friends.





	the art of fire

**Author's Note:**

> this is unfinished, and i currently have no motivation or ideas to finish, but i hope you enjoy nonetheless <3

Today is Carter’s first day at kindergarten, and Steve is terrified. He never thought he’d be the emotional parent, but when he saw Carter all ready, with his backpack, he couldn’t help but shed a few tears. Without Carter seeing, of course.

 

Carter was such a sweet kid, always smiling and laughing. He’d inherited his mother’s smile, and Steve was forever grateful for that. He was a spitting image of her, with Steve’s eyes. Carter would sometimes wake up in the middle of the night, and cry out for her, and there was nothing Steve could do except invite him into his bed and cry with him.If any kid even glanced at Carter, Steve was ready to throw them out of a window. He just hoped he wouldn’t have to resort to that.

 

‘’Dad, let’s go! I’m tired of taking pictures.’’ Carter whines.

 

‘’I’m just so proud of you, my little boy is all grown up!’’ Steve ruffles Carter’s dark brown hair.

 

‘’ _Dad,_ I’m not little, I’m five!’’ Carter exclaims and accepts the lunchbox Steve hands him.

 

‘’Alright kid, we gotta go now.’’ Steve smiles and grabs the car keys off the counter.

 

\---

 

 

After dropping off Carter, and driving to work, he sits in the parked car for a few moments, and goes through photos of himself, Carter and Peggy, before they lost her. Their holiday to visit her parents in London, Carter and Peggy sleeping in a tiny hospital bed, Steve and Peggy at their wedding. After a few moments, and a few tears, he exits the car and makes his way into the teachers’ room.

 

‘’Damn, that hard, huh?’’ Sam appears beside him as he makes some coffee.

 

‘’Harder than expected, I’ll say that.’’ Steve smiles. ‘’I’m just scared, you know?’’

 

‘’Every other parent is scared, Steve. Most kids turn out fine.’’ Sam pats him on the back. ‘’Now go teach some kids how to draw a straight line.’’

 

Steve likes to be early to his classroom, to set everything up. Since it’s only the first day, and mostly new classes, he simply places a piece of paper and a pencil onto each desk. Then he sits down at the computer and waits for his class to arrive.

 

\---

 

Steve normally doesn’t leave so early, but once he entered the teachers’ room and started talking with Sam, Sam told him ‘’Go, you’re gonna make me sad too.’’

 

Once he pulls up at the kiss and ride, Carter is in the front and is beaming when he climbs into the car. Once he has his seatbelt on, he starts talking like there’s no tomorrow.

 

‘’Dad! The teacher was so fun. She made us draw a picture of us with something we love, so I drew me and you! Look!’’ Carter hands him a picture of two stick figures, one is small with dark brown messy hair and blue eyes, and the other is tall with blonde hair and a beard. It was not good, but it was going on the fridge as soon as they got home.

 

‘’It’s great, Carter. So I assume you had fun?’’ Steve asks.

 

‘’So much fun, dad! There’s a girl in my class, and I like her so much! We played together outside, and she loves the swings like me!’’

 

Carter keeps going on and on about this girl, named Alia, as Steve would later learn. She liked to puzzle, draw, and watch Phineas and Ferb, just like Carter.

 

Steve orders pizza, and they eat until they almost pass out from carb overdose. Carter hardly stops to breathe while talking about school, and Steve has to remind him multiple times to not eat with his mouth open.

 

Once Carter is asleep, Steve sits down to answer emails. He opens one from Sam, and the only thing there is a link to a wikihow article- _How to not be an emotional mess._ Steve simply chuckles.

 

\---

 

‘’Alia!’’ Carter yells and breaks into a smile in the middle of the baking aisle at the grocery store. ‘’Dad, that’s Alia!’’

 

Steve looks where Carter is pointing, and sees a small girl, next to a man, who Steve can only assume is her dad.

 

‘’Can we say hi, pleaseee dad?’’ Carter begs but before Steve can answer Carter is already halfway across the aisle. Steve follows Carter and stops in front of Alia’s dad.

 

Alia’s dad is watching them with a slight smile on his face. He has thick brown hair, which he’s pulled into a loose bun at the back of his head. He has a bit of a beard, and beautiful blue eyes. He’s absolutely gorgeous.

 

Steve tears his eyes off him, but doesn’t say anything.

 

‘’Hey, you’re Carter’s dad, right? I’m Bucky, Alia’s dad.’’ he smiles at Steve and goes to shake his hand.

 

‘’Yeah, yeah. I’m Steve.’’ Steve smiles and shakes his hand.

 

‘’So, our kids, huh?’’ Bucky makes an attempt at conversation.

 

‘’Yeah.’’ Steve laughs. ‘’You know, Alia’s all he talked about the first week of school. I was wondering when I could meet her.’’

 

Bucky smiles. ‘’She never stops talking about Carter. She hasn’t been as interested about anything in her life before.’’

 

Steve doesn’t say anything. He’d never been great at small talk, especially with people he found attractive.

 

‘’What do you do?’’ Bucky asks, eager to know more.

 

‘’I’m a high school art teacher.’’ Steve replies.

 

‘’Ahh, that’s where Carter gets his artistic talents from.’’ Bucky chuckles.

 

Steve raises his eyebrow at Bucky.

 

‘’Carter made Alia a dawing of them at school. It was quite good, I must say.’’ Bucky explains.

 

Steve laughs. ‘’I can only hope he improves.’’

 

Bucky smiles. ‘’Alia, sweet pea, we have to get going. You’ll see Carter at school tomorrow.’’

 

‘’But dad-‘’ Alia whines.

 

‘’Grandma and grandpa are waiting.’’ Bucky states. Alia sighs and waves goodbye to Carter, who waves back.

 

‘’I’ll see you around, then?’’ Bucky asks.

 

Steve nods, and smiles.

 

Once Bucky and Alia have left their sights, Carter turns to Steve and asks ‘’You like him.’’

 

‘’What?’’

 

‘’You like him, like you liked mommy.’’ Carter repeats. Steve sighs and pats him on the back.

 

‘’You’re too observant for your own good.’’

 

\---

 

Bucky kept popping up in Steve’s head as open house approached. Surely he’d see him again? Steve hoped so. He had to make conversation whether he liked it or not, since Carter kept going on and on about a play date after school with Alia. Steve would need to ask for Bucky’s number. Easy task, right?

 

Steve enters the classroom and is greeted by bright colors al over the walls, in the form of various drawings and other art. He immediately recognizes Carter’s distinct stick figures, and goes over to his section of the wall to look at them. A few of them were of Carter and Alia, a few of them were of random objects from Carter’s imagination, but one catches Steve’s attention. It’s a drawing of him, in a blue suit with a star on it. Above it he has written ‘’super dad’’ in wobbly letters. It makes Steve feel warm and fuzzy, as Carter tends to make him feel.

 

After looking at a few more drawings, Steve takes a seat in the circle of chairs in the middle of the floor. Parents are piling in, but no sign of Bucky.

 

At the last minute Bucky walks in, clearly out of breath. This time his hair isn’t in a bun, but hanging down on his shoulders. Bucky runs his hands through  his hair while looking over the classroom, looking for a seat. Steve unconsciously sits up straighter and runs his hand through his hair. Bucky notices an empty seat next to Steve and sits down. He seems to be going to make conversation but before he can begin the teacher starts talking.

 

The teacher talks for around thirty minutes before dismissing them. Once she is done Bucky turns to Steve.

 

‘’Steve, hey, how have you been?’’ he asks.

 

Steve smiles. ‘’I’ve been great, busy with work, how have you been?’’

 

‘’Great, thank you! Work has been kicking my ass as well.’’ Bucky replies.

 

‘’I never managed to ask you the other day, where do you work?’’ Steve asks, curiously.

 

‘’I’m a firefighter, but I’m a personal trainer on the side.’’ Bucky replies.

 

Of course he is. Of course a perfect man such as him has a job where he risks his life for his community. And of course he has two jobs, because of course his life is perfectly balanced.

 

‘’Listen, Alia has been going on and on and on about some playdate she and Carter have planned. I can only imagine Carter has been doing the same to you, right?’’ Bucky speaks again.

 

‘’Right, yeah, I was going to talk to you about that. It could be at my place, on Wednesday, I’m off work early then. Only if it works for you and Alia, of course.’’ Steve verbally vomits before Bucky has a chance to say something.

 

‘’Sounds great! Shouldn’t I get your number though, if anything changes, and to get your address and such?’’ Bucky asks.

 

‘’Right, of course.’’

 

 Bucky hands Steve his phone to put his number in.

 

‘’Well, then it’s a date! See you Wednesday!’’ Bucky smiles at Steve and stands up.

 

‘’Looking forward to it!’’ Steve replies.

 

Steve walks out of the classroom and feels his phone vibrate.

 

_And now you have my number :) –Bucky_

Steve smiles, and names the contact before putting his phone away and getting into his car.

 

Now he has Bucky’s number. But only for dad stuff, right?

 

\---

 

As Steve pulls up at the kiss and ride on Wednesday, a knot forms in his stomach. He’s picking up both Carter and Alia, for their play date, and Bucky is going to arrive later on.

 

Carter and Alia look like they’re having the time of their lives, like always. As they get their seatbelts on, the conversation just does not stop. Steve doesn’t try to intervene, he’d been yelled at by Carter enough.

 

‘’Dad? Did you buy poptarts?’’ Carter asks.

 

‘’I’ve told you before Carter, they’re terrible for you.’’ Steve sighs.

 

‘’But dad-‘’ Carter whines and Alia doesn’t hide her disappointment either.

 

‘’That’s why I bought ice cream instead.’’ Steve smiles.

 

Carter and Alia cheer and immediately start talking about their favorite ice cream flavors.

 

‘’My daddy likes ice cream a lot.’’ Alia states.

 

Steve perks up at that. ‘’Does he? What’s his favorite flavor?’’

 

‘’Mint chocolate. He’s boring.’’ Alia responds. Steve’s favorite flavor happens to be mint chocolate as well. The thought makes him feel a bit giddy.

 

‘’Well, I like mint chocolate, and I’m not boring, right Carter?’’ he says and raises his eyebrow at Carter in the mirror.

 

‘’Whatever dad.’’ Carter rolls his eyes and Steve chuckles.

 

Steve carries the kids’ backapcks into their apartment, and suddenly he’s hyperaware of everything that’s out of place inside. Carter’s pajamas from that morning were all over the living room floor and their breakfast was still on the table. Steve tries to be as tidy as he can, like a functional adult, but cleaning is just so _boring._ He tells the kids to go play in Carter’s room, at least that’s a justifiable mess.

 

Steve finishes cleaning the apartment, and the doorbell rings. He immediately stands up straighter and runs his hands through his hair. _‘’Why am I even making such an effort? He’s probably not even interested in men.’’_ Steve thinks to himself but he can’t help it. he so sincerely wished that Bucky was single and interested in him too, but he’d never know. what would he even do?

 

Steve opens the door to a smiling Bucky. He looks quite tired, from work.

 

‘’Hey!’’ Bucky says. Steve’s face lights up.

 

‘’Hey, come on in! Carter and Alia are playing in his room, if you want to see them?’’ Steve asks as Bucky enters and takes off his shoes.

 

‘’Nah, no need. I’m sure they’re fine. Nice place you have! I like the pictures.’’ Bucky stops to look at a picture of Carter and Peggy, but doesn’t say anything. Steve is grateful for that.

 

He leads the way into the living room and sits down on the couch. Steve sits down on the other end of the couch.

 

‘’How was work?’’ Steve asks, desperate to fill the silence.

 

‘’It was quite relaxed actually, no call today.’’ Bucky replies.

 

‘’Alia must be proud of you. Being a firefighter is super cool.’’ Steve smiles.

 

‘’She is. It’s the first thing she tells people when they meet her.’’ Bucky chuckles fondly. ‘’It’s super scary sometimes though. I worry everyday that I won’t make it home to her.’’

 

Steve nods. He wants to reassure him but before he can do that the kids run into the living room.

 

‘’Daddy!’’ Alia yells and runs into her father’s arms.

 

‘’Hey sweet pea! How was school? Are you having fun?’’ Bucky smiles and wraps his arms around her. He clearly cares so much about her.

 

‘’So much fun! Dad, Steve said he bought ice cream, can we have some, pretty please?’’ Alia begs.

 

‘’Oh? What kind?’’ Bucky raises his eyebrows at Steve.

 

‘’Mint chocolate and caramel.’’ Steve replies, standing up to get the ice cream and some bowls. When he returns, he’s sat in between Carter and Alia, telling them a story from work. Steve stands in the doorway, admiring them for a few moments.

 

‘’Dad! The ice cream is gonna melt!’’ Carter yells when he notices him. Steve hurries to the living room table and starts scooping the ice cream. He hands Bucky a bowl full of mint chocolate.

 

‘’Mint chocolate is my favorite! How did you know?’’Bucky says as he takes a bite.

 

‘’A little bird told me.’’ Steve replies and winks at Alia, who smiles back at him, face already sticky from the ice cream.

 

‘’Well, that little bird knew what she was talking about.’’ Bucky says, and rubs Alia on the back. He smiles at Steve, a soft, and _real_ smile, and it feels like a horse kicking Steve’s chest.

 

They finish their ice cream, and Carter and Alia go back to Carter’s room. Steve gathers the bowls and spoons and goes into the kitchen. Bucky stays in the living room.

 

Once the bowls and spoons are in the dishwasher, Steve has to lean against the counter because _holy shit he’s here._ He’s been keeping his cool, or trying to, but he’s _nervous._  He feels like a teenager again. As awkward as he feels, he doesn’t want Bucky to leave. But he knows it’s almost dinner, and ice cream is not a substantial meal for anyone. Bucky will want to leave soon to give his daughter a nice dinner, like Steve wants to do soon.

 

Steve feels incredibly _relaxed,_ and _comfortable_ around Bucky. Is he taking this too seriously? Bucky might very well hate him, and maybe he’s only there for his daughter’s sake. Steve wouldn’t blame him. Steve leans against the counter and sighs deeply. He really doesn’t know what to do. He doesn’t want to make a move until he gets an idea of what Bucky feels for him, but he feels like he might go insane if he stays in the dark.

 

‘’Steve, you okay?’’ Bucky walks into the kitchen, with a concerned look on his face.

 

‘’Yeah, I’m fine. Just got carried away.’’ he smiles at Bucky, but Bucky doesn’t look convinced. He doesn’t say anything though.

 

‘’Listen, Alia and I better get going.’’ Bucky says.

 

‘’Right, right. Dinnertime.’’ Steve smiles and he motions for Bucky to follow him to Carter’s room.

 

‘’Alia, sweet pea, we gotta go now.’’ Bucky smiles at his daughter, who pouts at him.

 

‘’I don’t wanna go! I like being at Carter’s house!’’ she crosses her arms and sits down on the floor.

 

Bucky smiles. ‘’I do too, and we’ll be back soon, but it’s dinnertime now! Steve and Carter need to eat their dinner, and we need to eat ours!’’

 

_We’ll._ Crazy how one word can make a person so incredibly happy. It may sound simple, but Steve takes it as though Bucky enjoys his company. Possibly because of Alia, but Steve doesn’t want to think about it right now. His heart is soaring.

 

Steve and Carter follow Bucky and Alia to the door, and they share a goodbye that feels like it’s the last time they’re going to see each other in months, when in reality they have school the next day.

 

‘’You’re gonna see each other tomorrow guys, let’s not get too sad.’’ Steve smiles and Carter looks at him like he’s just threatened to kill his grandmother.

 

\---

 

Sam comes over for dinner one night, and Carter is over the moon. Sam is Carter’s godfather, and they’ve always been very close. They often gang up and tease Steve, and tonight is no exception.

 

‘’Sam, dad made soup last night. _Soup._ ’’ Carter says and looks Sam very seriously in the eyes. Sam bursts out laughing.

 

‘’Oh _no,_ Carter! Your dad is turning into an old man in front of our very eyes!’’ he smiles and Carter nods.

 

‘’He dresses like an old man too.’’ Sam whispers in Carter’s ear, causing him to shriek with glee.

 

‘’Hey, my sweaters aren’t too bad!’’ Steve defends himself.

 

‘’Sure, dad.’’ Carter answers and Sam almost bursts out laughing again.

 

‘’Bucky has cool clothes.’’ Carter says out of the blue. Steve’s muscles tense at the mention of Bucky.

 

‘’Bucky?’’ Sam asks with a knowing tone, Steve will be interrogated about this later. Steve simply fills his mouth with pasta.

 

‘’He’s Alia’s dad. Alia’s my best friend.’’ Carter states, oblivious to what is going on between the adults.

 

‘’Do you like her better than me?’’ Sam turns his attention to Carter again, but gives Steve a look. _Fuck._

 

‘’ _Duh._ ’’ Carter states the obvious.

 

\---

 

Once Steve returns from tucking Carter into bed, he sits down on the couch next to Sam with a cup of tea.

 

‘’See, old man.’’ Sam gestures to the tea. Steve doesn’t say anything.

 

‘’So, who’s this Bucky guy? You got a thing going?’’ Sam asks.

 

‘’Nah, nothing. Simply friends.’’ Steve sighs.

 

‘’But you want to be more.’’ Sam completes the sentence. Steve nods.

 

‘’I don’t even know if he’s into men. Hell, I don’t know if he’s _single._ ’’ Steve sighs and Sam pats him on the back.

 

‘’Are you scared, after Peggy? You haven’t dated anyone since, have you?’’ Sam asks. Steve’s silence is enough of an answer.

 

‘’Dating as a single dad isn’t exactly easy.’’ Steve chuckles.

 

‘’I can imagine. But since he’s got a kid of his own, he could understand. I wouldn’t rule out the possibility immediately. Does he enjoy your company?’’ Sam continues.

 

‘’I think he does? He’s not opposed to the idea of coming over with Alia again, that’s a good sign, right?’’ Steve wonders.

 

‘’Absolutely! I’m not gonna say whether he likes you or not, but that’s for sure a good sign. ’’ Sam smiles.

 

‘’You always have to be such a psychologist when we meet.’’ Steve jokes.

 

‘’When I’m faced with a case such as you, I can’t help it. I should start charging you for hanging out with me.’’ Sam laughs.

 

\---

 

On Saturday Carter wakes up Steve by jumping on his bed, and on top of him.

 

‘’Dad! Dad! Dad! Cartoons are starting! We can’t miss ‘em!’’ he yells and rips the covers off of Steve’s body.

 

‘’I’m coming.’’ Steve mumbles.

 

He closes his eyes again and lays his head on the pillow. Carter sighs and lays down next to him.

 

‘’Dad.’’ He whispers.

 

‘’Tricked you!’’ Steve yells and tightly wraps his arms around Carter and starts tickling him. Carter shrieks and tries to break free but he can’t.

 

‘’Dad! Dad!’’ he manages to exclaim between fits of laughter. Steve eventually stops and lets Carter drag him out of bed. They turn on cartoons and Carter sits down on the couch while Steve goes to the kitchen to make breakfast. He starts by making coffee, he’s still half asleep.

 

Steve decides to make waffles, which are a once a month treat, and they’re Carter’s favorite. He still just uses a waffle mix, because something always goes wrong.

 

Once the waffles are ready he gathers a variety of toppings, syrup, nutella, whipped cream and berries.  Carter’s face lights up when he sees the waffles and he eats way more than a five year old should be able to. Steve eats a ton too. He tries to generally eat healthy foods, but he can’t resist a good waffle.

 

Once they’re finished, Steve wraps his arm around Carter, who lays his head down on his chest. They stay like that for a while, just watching cartoons. Steve definitely falls asleep at one point, but Carter doesn’t notice.

 

Saturday mornings like this are Steve’s favorite. He loves his son more than anything in the world, and spending time with him makes Steve indescribably happy.

 

‘’Carter? You wanna go to the park?’’ Steve asks after a couple hours, when they’re still curled up on the couch. Carter perks up at the thought and runs to his room to get dressed.

 

‘’You gonna choose your own clothes?’’ Steve yells after him, but no answer. Steve gets up too to put on his own clothes. Carter takes a long time, and when Steve goes to check on him, he’s dressed in green pants that are way too small and an orange T-shirt. He looks incredibly proud but also confused by the fit of the pants.  Steve has to control his laughter.

 

After they are both dressed in appropriate and well-fitting clothes, they put on jackets and beanies and scarves. Steve never gets sick but Carter is quite sensitive. Steve always finds Carter absolutely adorable when he’s dressed for the cold weather.

 

They walk to the park in their neighbourhood, and spend a good hour there, beofre Carter starts complaining about cold. Once they get home, Carter demands a movie, blankets and hot chocolate, and Steve happily obliges. Steve often boasts about making the best hot chocolate, the trick is adding a bit of cinnamon.

 

They curl up on the couch, and decide to watch _The Lion King._ Carter sings along to every song, and it melts Steve’s heart.

 

\---

 

The Sunday after it is pouring rain so Steve and Carter stay inside.

 

‘’Dad, did someone just knock?’’ Carter asks absentmindedly while playing with dinosaurs on the living room floor. Steve goes to check, and once he open the door, Bucky and Alia smile at him, both soaking wet. Steve tries to not pay attention to the soaking wet white t-shirt that is clinging to Bucky’s body, showing off the clear definition on his stomach. His cheeks are red from the cold, and his lips look red and plump. Steve tries to focus on eye contact.

 

‘’Hey, sorry to intrude, but we were in the neighborhood and it started raining and we-‘’ Bucky begins.

 

‘’No need to explain, come in. You can shower and borrow some clothes.’’ Steve says. Bucky smiles gratefully and he and Alia walk into the apartment. Carter breaks into a huge smile when he realizes who it is.

 

‘’Alia!’’ he exclaims and goes to hug her.

 

‘’I think we’ll accept the shower and the clothes, thank you.’’ Bucky turns to Steve.

 

‘’Right, of course.’’ Steve says and goes to find clothes for Bucky and Alia.

 

Steve decides to let Bucky borrow his most comfortable sweatpants, definitely not because they’re gonna make his ass look amazing. _Definitely_ not.

 

He hands Bucky their clothes, and he takes Alia into the bathroom to wash.

 

Steve decides to make hot chocolate for the four of them, because who doesn’t love hot chocolate. Carter insists on helping to make sure it’s up to his standards. Carter approves of the finished product, so Steve decides to add some marshmallows, something he rarely does and when Carter notices he squeals with delight.

 

Bucky returns with Alia, and Steve’s heart flutters at the sight of Bucky wearing his clothes. His ass _does_ look amazing, but Steve does his best not to look.

 

‘’I uh- I made hot chocolate,’’ Steve says and gestures to the four mugs on the table.’’I can make coffee, if you’d prefer that, but-‘’ he rambles on when Bucky doesn’t react. Bucky smiles gratefully.

 

‘’Chocolate’s great, thank you.’’

 

They each grab a mug and sit down on the couch. Steve watches Bucky to see his reaction. Bucky takes his first sip and his eyes are a mix of surprise and delight. He licks his lips (Steve gulps) and takes another sip.

 

‘’It’s absolutely delicious. How do you do it?’’ Bucky asks, sincerely.

 

‘’A great chef never tells.’’ Steve winks. ‘’ _Why did I do that?’’_ he thinks to himself immediately afterwards. Bucky laughs.

 

‘’I only ever use the powdered stuff. Alia’s very disappointed in me.’’ Bucky ruffles her hair.

 

‘’The powdered stuff is always a mistake. Maybe I’ll teach you someday?’’ Steve doesn’t mean to say that, but he does it anyway.

 

‘’I’d like that.’’ Bucky grins and takes another sip.

 

Steve is in too deep.

 

\---

 

The rain doesn’t stop for hours, so Bucky and Alia end up staying for a while. Carter and Alia go to his room to play, inevitably leaving Steve and Bucky alone.

 

‘’You-You’re a good dad.’’ Bucky says after a few moments of silence. Steve looks up at him and their eyes meet. His eyes are gorgeous. They’re a stunning bright blue, and the contrast between his dark hair and light eyes makes Steve go weak at the knees.

 

‘’I know what it’s like to be a single dad, and you’re doing a great job.’’ he continues.

 

‘’Thank you.’’ Steve says slowly.

 

‘’May I ask- did you have a girlfriend? How did Carter come to be?’’ Bucky asks. Steve’s heart stings.

 

‘’I was married. Her name was Peggy. She died when Carter was three, from cancer.’’ Steve whispers. He didn’t want to cry, not now.

 

‘’I’m sorry.’’ Bucky whispers.

 

‘’That’s her.’’ Steve says and points at a picture of Peggy and Carter, when he was a few months old. It was his favorite picture. He’d taken it without her knowing. She was playing with Carter and in the picture they’re both smiling wide.

 

Bucky smiles. ‘’She’s beautiful.’’

 

Steve nods. ‘’How about you? If you don’t mind me asking, of course.’’ he adds.

 

‘’I wasn’t married. We’d only been together a few months, and I thought I loved her, but when I look back, I’m not so sure. Anyway, her name was Natasha and she died in childbirth.’’ he says.

 

‘’That’s tragic. I’m sorry.’’ Steve mutters. Bucky doesn’t seem to mind too much.

 

‘’That got deep quite fast, sorry for ruining the mood.’’ Bucky chuckles.

 

‘’Don’t worry! I’ve been curious for a while, actually, but I was too scared to ask, so I’m glad you asked.’’ Steve reassures him. Bucky smiles, one of those _real_ and _soft_ smiles, that make Steve’s heart do multiple backflips.

 

Bucky moves a bit closer. He looks so beautiful, in comfortable clothes and hair up in a messy bun.

 

He’s close enough to kiss.

 

But Steve doesn’t do anything. He’s still scared. He knows Bucky is single, but that doesn’t mean he’s interested in men. But _gosh,_ Steve hoped so.

 

‘’It looks like it’s stopped raining.’’ Bucky states, almost like he hopes he’s wrong.

 

Steve looks out of the window, and sure enough, everything’s clear.

 

‘’We should probably get going. Thank you so much for allowing us to crash.’’ Bucky smiles.

 

Steve almost asks him to stay. The words are on the tip of his tongue, but they don’t come out. Bucky looks like he’s ready to go, and Steve doesn’t blame him.

 

They go to get Alia, and she and Carter share another heartfelt goodbye, despite the fact that they are both well aware they’ll see each other tomorrow.

 

When they’re ready to leave, Bucky thanks Steve once again. He looks like he’s going to hug him for a split second, but ultimately decides against it. He takes Alia’s hand, waves goodbye and closes the door behind him.

 

The apartment feels strangely empty.

 

\---

 

Carter doesn’t have school today, so he has to tag along to Steve’s classes. His classes don’t seem to mind, he just draws in the corner, but work is ususally a distraction from personal life, and Carter draws constant reminders of personal life, specifically Alia. And Alia just reminds Steve of Bucky. Which is not what he needs while teaching.

 

In Steve’s third class, Carter has already made ten _very_ detailed drawings of him and Alia, playing with various things. Steve was sure he saw them hanging out with dinosaurs on one of them. He could see that he was getting bored though.

 

‘’To draw a face, you need relaxed, soft, smooth li-‘’

 

‘’Dad!’’ Carter yells. Steve gives him a serious look, while his class almst bursts out laughing.

 

Steve finishes what he was saying, and leaves the class to work. Carter looks quite upset as Steve walks over to him.

 

‘’What’s up, little man? Bored of drawing?’’ he asks gently. Carter nods.

 

‘’I don’t know what you can do, buddy. Your babysitter is at school, I think you need to stay here.’’ Steve tells him.

 

‘’Alia is spending today with her dad. He’s on vacation.’’ Carter pouts.

 

‘’ _Carter-_ ‘’ Steve begins.

 

‘’Do you think I could go to their house? Please, please, pleaseeee?’’ Carter looks at Steve with his puppy eyes that Steve can’t resist.

 

‘’ _Fine_ , I’ll call, but I can’t promise anything.’’ Steve sighs and goes to his desk to call Bucky.

 

His finger hovers over the call button for a few moments. He really doesn’t want to annoy Bucky. He eventually presses the button.

 

‘’Hello?’’ Bucky answers.

 

‘’Hey, it’s Steve. Sorry to bother you.’’ Steve sighs.

 

‘’No worry!’’ Bucky says, a hint of a smile in his voice.

 

Steve smiles too. ‘’I hate to ask, but I have Carter with me in class right now and he’s bored out of his mind, and his babysitter is at school, I was wondering if he could maybe go to your house? I’d be able to drop him off in around half an hour.’’ he asks, nervous for Bucky’s reaction.

 

‘’Yeah, of course! Alia and I are actually in the neighborhood, so we can pick him up in around ten minutes.’’ Bucky says.

 

‘’You’re a _saint_ , thank you so much.’’ Steve exhales with relief.

 

‘’See you in ten minutes!’’ Bucky says and hangs up. Steve nods at Carter who’s looking at him with questioning eyes and he brightens up.

 

Ten minutes later there’s a knock on the door. Steve opens the door to a grinning Bucky.

 

‘’Thank you so much, I really appreciate it.’’ Steve blurts out as Bucky goes to gather everything that Carter brought with him.

 

‘’Don’t worry, we had nothing better to do anyways.’’ Bucky says. ‘’You ready to go, Carter?’’

 

‘’I need to give my dad a drawing.’’ Carter mutters. He hands Steve a folded piece of paper as Steve kneels down to give him a hug and a kiss.

 

‘’Be good, okay? I love you.’’ he whispers in Carter’s ear. He stands up and smiles at Bucky.

 

‘’I’ll pick him up at around three. Thank you, again’’ he says. Bucky smiles at him and he and Carter wave as they walk out the door.

 

When Steve turns towards his class, they all have dumb smiles on their faces. One student slowly raises her hand.

 

‘’Mr. Rogers, was that your boyfriend?’’ she asks curiously. Steve slowly shakes his head and his class takes the hint and gets back to work.

 

Steve sits down at his desk and opens the drawing Carter gave him.

 

It’s a drawing of Steve, Carter, Alia and Bucky. Above them it says _fAmyly_ , in Carter’s wobbly handwriting.

 

Steve wishes it were true.

 

\---

 

Steve feels a knot form in his stomach as he pulls up to Bucky’s place. It looks quite big. He walks slowly to the front door and knocks. Carter comes to answer the door and immediately hugs him tight.

 

‘’Hey little man, you had fun today?’’ Steve smiles and rubs his back.

 

‘’ _So_ much fun dad. Alia’s house is so cool! Bucky gave us some cake! Did you see the drawing I gave you? Did you like it?’’ Carter blurts out all at once.

 

‘’I saw it, and I love it.’’ Steve says sincerely, and Carter smiles.

 

Carter grabs his arm and leads him into the kitchen, where Bucky and Alia are sat eating cake.

 

‘’Hey Steve!’’ Alia waves. Bucky smiles at him.

 

‘’How are you guys doing? Had a good day?’’ Steve asks. Alia nods furiously.

 

‘’Want some cake?’’ Bucky asks.

 

‘’I’m fine, thanks.’’ Steve replies, Carter gapes in surprise.

 

‘’But, _dad,_ Bucky makes such good cake! You _have_ to try it.’’ he states, like it’s the most important thng in the world. Alia nods again.

 

‘’Fine, I guess I’ll have a piece.’’ Steve cuts himself a small slice and takes a bite. He can’t help the surprised noise that leaves his mouth, because _fuck_ this cake is good. He looks at Bucky  in shock.

 

‘’I never knew you were such a good baker!’’ he exclaims.

 

‘’We all have our secret talents, don’t we?’’ Bucky smiles, and Steve feels at home.

 

This is what he wants. He wants to come home to Bucky, and the kids. He wants to have nice conversations with them. He wants them to tell him about their days.

 

He wants this family.

 

He catches Bucky looking at him, and biting his lip. He quickly looks away.

 

‘’Lisa has a new mom.’’ Alia says absentmindedly.

 

‘’Does she now?’’ Bucky answers, disinterested.

 

‘’Her dad is gonna marry her, Lisa says. He hasn’t been married in a long time. Why do grown ups take so long to get married?’’ she asks.

 

Steve almost chokes on his cake.

 

‘’Well, grown ups want to make sure that the person they’re with is right for both them, and their family.’’ Bucky says, while looking at Steve. Steve nods, his chest tight.

 

‘’I think Lisa was glad her dad wasn’t so alone anymore. She doesn’t see him much, only on weekends.’’ Carter adds.

 

The air is thick. Steve can’t tear his eyes off Bucky. Everyone is silent for a few moments.

 

‘’Dad?’’ Carter whispers.

 

‘’Yeah?’’

 

‘’I don’t feel so good. Can we go home?’’ he asks, rubbing his stomach.

 

‘’Of course, little man. Be sure to thank Bucky and Alia for allowing you to stay.’’ Steve says, avoiding Bucky’s eyes.

 

‘’Thanks.’’ he mutters.

 

‘’Thank you again.’’ Steve smiles at Bucky, who smiles back.

 

Steve sits in the car for a few moments before driving off. He wants to bang his head against the steering wheel. He’s a complete mess.

 

\---

 

Carter has the stomach bug, which confines him to his bed for a few days. Steve calls off work, and he misses it. Carter is no company when he’s sick like this, and Steve is lonely.

 

Carter doesn’t eat at all the first day, and on the second he only eats plain toast. He looks incredibly pale and weak. It hurts Steve’s heart.

 

On the third day he looks a bit better, and manages to eat more than just toast. On the third day Steve also gets a text from Bucky.

 

_how is carter doing? alia is worried sick. she thinks he’s in the hospital and won’t listen to me._

**he just has the stomach bug, should be fine in a day or so. tell her carter misses her lots :)**

Bucky doesn’t reply.

 

Steve tries not to overthink.

 

\---

 

It is a joyous occasion in the Rogers household on Friday when Carter is finally well enough to go to school. He finishes his breakfast, which makes Steve inexplicably happy.

 

Steve has never been so happy to be at work. He smiles a ton, which is something his students are not used to. Steve is just glad that he has other things to think about. Bucky was the ony thing on his mind during Carter’s sick days.

 

He wants to be with him so badly, but Bucky is giving such mixed signals. One minute it feels like they’re flirting, the next they’re just dads whose kids are best friend and are forced to be around each other.

 

Peggy has also been on his mind. The anniversary of her death is in a week. Steve isn’t sure if Carter knows, and he’s not sure how to break it to him. It’s on a Saturday, so they’re gonna go to the graveyard and put flowers on her grave and light a candle. Steve is nervous. He has to be there for Carter, but he’s always devastated himself.

 

Sam knows it’s coming, and he acts extra gentle with Steve in the week leading up to it.

 

On Thursday before the anniversary, Steve decides to break it to Carter at dinner.

 

‘’Carter, buddy, there’s something I need to talk to you about.’’ He says. Carter looks up from his chicken and potatoes, and raises his eyebrows.

 

‘’On Saturday, it’s- it’s gonna be two years since your mommy died. We’re gonna go to her grave and put flowers and candle, you think you can do that, buddy?’’ Steve asks gently.

 

Carter nods slowly.

 

‘’It’s okay to cry. I want you to know that. I miss her so much, too.’’ Steve reaches for his hands. Carter doesn’t say much.

 

‘’Do you remember her?’’

 

‘’Yeah. Not much. I remember going on the swings with her.’’ Carter whispers. Steve smiles.

 

‘’We’ll get through this. You and me, pal.’’

 

\---

 

On Friday night Carter crawls into Steve’s bed. He doesn’t say anything, but Steve can hear him crying. Steve wraps his arms around him, and cries too.

 

\---

 

Carter picks out flowers at the store. He picks Calla Lilies. Those flowers had been a key part of Steve and Peggy’s wedding. Steve almost breaks down when he sees Carter pick them.

 

When they step out of the car at the graveyard, Carter grabs Steve’s hand and holds tight. Steve does his best to keep it together, for Carter’s sake, but when they arrive at her grave he can’t help but burst into tears.

 

He kneels down by Carter’s side and lights a candle. Carter sniffles beside him and places the flowers on her grave.

 

Steve feels like time is frozen.

 

Tears stream down both of their faces, and Carter wraps his arms tightly around his father. They stay like that for what feels like hours, but in reality it’s something closer to five minutes.

 

Steve eventually pulls away.

 

‘’Let’s get back to the car, buddy.’’ Steve grabs his hand and Carter nods, wiping his nose.

 

Steve can tell how hard this is for Carter, and he tries to stay strong. For dinner he makes Peggy’s favorite, carbonara pasta. They talk about Peggy over dinner. Steve tells him about the time they visited Peggy’s parents in London, and Carter cried nearly the whole flight. This gets a few laughs out of Carter, and he continues asking about his mother during the entire meal. Steve is happy to focus on his happy memories with Peggy.

 

That night Carter falls asleep in Steve’s bed. After tucking him in, Steve goes to the living room, and cries.

 

\---

 

The mood brightens over the next few days. Steve goes out for drinks with Sam, which he really needed. It’s almost Thanksgiving, and Steve worries what to do. He has no family, both his parents are dead and he’s an only child. The only family they have is Peggy’s family, who live in England.

 

Steve is scared that Carter is gonna feel different from the other kids, who always talk about Thanksgiving with their huge families. Last year it was just the two of them, Steve did his best to cook a proper thanksgiving meal but he’s no chef and the turkey burned severely. Steve tried to order a pizza, but the pizza place was closed, so they ended up eating eggs and toast.

 

Carter didn’t seem to mind then, but Steve wasn’t sure how he would react now.

 

‘’Dad?’’ Carter says while watching cartoons. ‘’What are we gonna do on Thanksgiving? Are grandma and grandpa gonna come?’’ he asks hopefully.

 

Steve hesitates. ‘’I’m afraid not, buddy. It’s just you and me.’’

 

Carter nods.

 

‘’Are you upset?’’ Steve asks.

 

‘’No. I like being with you, dad.’’ Carter smiles.

 

Steve grins. ‘’I love you, buddy.’’

 

‘’I love you too.’’ Carter says.

 

\---

 

Thanksgiving rolls around and Steve cooks a chicken and roasts some potatoes. They both eat until they can hardly move. Carter chooses _Aladdin_ from their extensive Disney movie collection. They cuddle up on the couch and Carter falls asleep on Steve’s shoulder.

 

The next day they plan to order pizza but before they can do that Bucky texts Steve.

 

_hey you home?_

**yeah what’s up?**

_too many leftovers from last night. do you and carter want to come over?_

**we’ll be there in twenty**

‘’Carter! We’re going to Bucky and Alia’s!’’ Steve yells out for Carter. Carter comes running, a huge smile on his face.

 

Steve and Carter pull up at Bucky’s and Alia answers the door before they can knock. She and Carter smile and hug each other and she even hugs Steve.

 

When they enter the kitchen there’s a feast on the table.

 

‘’These are all leftovers?’’ Steve wonders out loud.

 

‘’My parents cancelled on us last night.’’ Bucky smiles. ‘’Dig in.’’

 

Bucky doesn’t have to tell them twice. Steve grabs a huge portion of turkey, mashed potatoes, gravy and veggies. It’s absolutely delicious, like all of Bucky’s cooking is.

 

‘’Did you cook all of this?’’ Steve asks.

 

Bucky nods.

 

Of course he did.

 

‘’How has your Thanksgiving been?’’ Bucky asks.

 

Carter takes the responsibility of telling Bucky all about his past few days, not sparing the detail of Steve singing along to every song in _Aladdin_ , causing Steve to groan in embarrassment. Bucky grins.

 

‘’That’s something I’d love to see.’’ he winks at Steve.

 

‘’Can we have a movie night sometime? Pretty please?’’ Alia asks.

 

‘’Yes!’’ Carter yells.

 

They all bring their best eating game to the table, but their combined power is not enough.

 

‘’We’re gonna be eating leftovers until Christmas.’’ Bucky mutters.

 

Carter and Alia go to her room to play, Steve and Bucky stay in the kitchen to clean up.

 

‘’Did you have a good Thanksgiving?’’ Bucky asks quietly.

 

‘’Yeah, I enjoyed it.’’ Steve says as he places another plate in the dishwasher.

 

Their hands brush together and Steve’s breath catches in his throat. He wants to grab Bucky’s hand, kiss his knuckles. When is he going to do something about this?

 

Bucky clears his throat and reaches into a cupboard for some Tupperware.

 

‘’Oh, we don’t need-‘’ Steve tries to deny his generosity but Bucky won’t have any of it.

 

‘’Yes you do.’’ he says, scooping mashed potatoes into one of the containers.

 

‘’Thanks for coming by the way. I have to admit, I was quite upset when my parents cancelled on us and if you wouldn’t have come I’d have been devastated.’’ Bucky smiles.

 

‘’I should be the one thanking you. Carter needed this.’’ Steve replies.

 

‘’But what-‘’ Bucky hesitates, ‘’What do you need?’’

 

Steve only needs one thing, and the only thing stopping him is the open dishwasher between them. He can feel himself leaning towards Bucky, only focusing on his gorgeously plump lips.

 

But then Alia comes in, demanding pie.

 

‘’Sure, of course.’’ Bucky mutters, getting out four small plates and a pumpkin pie from the fridge.

 

They eat pie in the front of the TV until Carter is exhusted and asks to go home. Steve doesn’t want to go, but his son comes first. Always.

 

He carries Carter to the car, but at the last minute he turns around to look at Bucky, who’s still standing in the doorway. Steve smiles, and raises his hand to wave goodbye. Bucky smiles, and closes the door.

 

On the way home, Carter mutters. ‘’Y’know dad, I always thought I’d get another mommy, like my friend Lisa. But now that I think about it, having two dads wouldn’t be so bad either.’’

 

\---

 

Soon after Thanksgiving Carter demands another playdate so Steve and Bucky arrange it. it’s at Steve’s house again but this time Bucky doesn’t stay. He simply drops her off, says a quick goodbye and he’s out the door again. Steve tries to not overthink it, but he’s upset. Did he do something? He can’t help but think it’s his fault.

 

Things ended quite abruptly the other night, maybe that’s it. That’s what Steve tells himself, at least.

 

\---

 

Back in June Steve got Carter tickets to Disney World, and in December it’s finally time for them to go. Carter burst into tears when he opened them, and when they boarded the plane he almost cried again.

 

‘’We’re gonna meet Mickey!’’. ‘’Do you think Buzz Lightyear is gonna take us to space?’’ is just a few of the things Carter said while on the way to the resort. Steve is a huge Disney nerd, so he’s just as excited as Carter is. One of the perks of having a kid is that it’s basically an excuse to do ‘childish’ things.

 

It is early morning, and Steve and Carter arrive at the Magic Kingdom, ready for the day. Carter goes absolutely insane when they walk down Main Street. His jaw drops when he sees Cinderella’s castle and Steve thinks he might lose him then and there.

 

The first ride they go on is _Buzz Lightyear’s Space Ranger Spin_. Carter has been loving _Toy Story_ lately, so that was a clear first choice. Carter squeals in delight over every small detail.

 

Steve’s heart melts at every single thing Carter does. He wishes he was experiencing everything for the first time too.

 

They enter a merchandise store, and Carter sees a pair of Mickey ears and _loses_ his mind.

 

‘’Dad! Dad! Can we get matching Mickey ears?’’ he tugs on Steve’s sleeve and drags him over. The price makes Steve feel a bit sick at first, but Carter is so excited about them that he can’t help but buy them a pair. Carter smiles so wide when Steve puts them on.

 

Carter also demands they buy a pair for Alia, and Steve sneakily buys a pair for Bucky as well. Steve also buys a small stuffed Piglet- his favourite _Winnie the Pooh_ character.

 

They go on the _Winnie the Pooh_ ride, and Carter is enchanted. Although he’d never admit it, Steve almost bursts into tears. He grew up with the _Winnie the Pooh_ books, and the _Winnie the_ Pooh christmas film is his absolute favorite.

 

When they get to their resort room at 7pm, Carter passes out almost immediately.

 

The next day they check out more _Toy Story_ stuff, and somehow Steve ends up buying small figures of the entire gang. He also buys _Toy Story_ pajamas for Carter- _Winnie the Pooh_ ones for himself.

 

Carter tries a Dole whip float for the first time, and he feelslike he’ll never live again if he can’t have them all the time.

 

When Carter meets Mickey, he can’t control his tears. He hugs Mickey tight, and it seems like he’s never gonna let go. Steve manages to snap a few pictures of them hugging, as well as the official picture.

 

The third day is their last- much to Carter’s dismay.

 

‘’Can we move here?’’ he asks while waiting in line for _Peter Pan’s flight._

 

‘’You know I’d love to, but wouldn’t it get boring after a while?’’ Steve says.

 

‘’Disney is _never_ gonna be boring, dad, oh my _god_.’’ Carter whines.

 

‘’We’ll try and go back next year, how about that?’’ Steve asks, already knowing the answer. Carter nods furiously.

 

‘’Dad, it’s almost our turn!’’

 

\---

 

When they get back Steve sends Carter with the ears for Alia and Bucky to school.

 

Later that night, Bucky texts him a selfie of him and Alia with the ears. Steve feels like he’s just got a cavity- in his heart.

 

(Later that night, Sam also texts him a picture. Steve made it on the _dilfs_of_disneyland_ Instagram page.)

 

\---

 

_Steve turns in his bed to face Bucky. Bucky smiles._

_‘’Morning, sweetheart.’’_

_Steve smiles and kisses him. ‘’Have a good sleep?’’_

_Bucky nods. He caresses Steve’s cheek gently, his smile not leaving his face._

_Then Bucky disappears._

_Suddenly Steve is at the hospital, watcing Bucky breathe through a mask. His eyes are closed, and his skin looks perfect. He looks perfectly calm, even though no one else in the room is._

_Steve tries to ignore the gaping hole in Bucky’s stomach. The knives working away at his muscles, organs and bones. He tries to focus on Bucky’s face._

_Alia is at their home, with her grandparents. Steve’s heart aches for her._

_Steve starts to zone out as the heart monitor starts beeping and the doctors scramble to get Bucky to wake up._

_\---_

Steve wakes up with tears running down his face. His pillow is soaking wet with more of his tears. He checks the time- 3AM. As he catches his breath, he can tell how tired he is but he knows he’s never gonna fall asleep after that.

 

He instinctively checks on Carter. He wasn’t in the nightmare but he has a bad feeling in his gut. Steve isn’t superstitious, but you can never be too sure. He resists the urge to call Bucky. Surely he’s fine, at home sleeping.

 

Steve grabs a glass of ice water and gulps it down. He’s still _worried._ He doesn’t know what to do. He very nearly calls the hospital, but he decides that would be too far.

 

‘’Dad, I’m thirsty.’’ Steve hears Carter mumble behind him. Steve gets him a glass of ice water, and Carter sits down at the table, taking small sips. Steve isn’t convinced he’s awake.

 

Once they’ve both finished their water, Steve carries Carter back to his room, kisses him on the forehead and tucks him in.

 

Then he goes back to his room, and tries to fall back asleep.

 

\---

 

Steve goes to work and teaches his classes just fine, but the nightmare is still in the back of his mind.

 

At lunchtime his phone rings. Steve doesn’t recognize the number.

 

‘’Steve Rogers.’’ he answers.

 

‘’ _Hello Mr. Rogers, I’m calling from Brooklyn Methodist Hospital.’’_ a female voice says.

 

Steve’s heart drops.

 

‘’ _I’m calling on behalf of James Buchanan Barnes, you were listed as an emergency contact in his mobile phone.’’_ she continues.

 

_What?_ Steve is confused, but he thinks he knows where this is going.

 

‘’ _Mr. Barnes has suffered a serious injury in line of duty. He is going under emergency surgery right now.’’_

‘’W-Will he be alright?’’ Steve manages to say.

 

_‘’We’re not sure. We have also called his parents, and they told me that they’d like you to get his daughter from school. The school has been contacted about this matter.’’_

‘’Of- of course. Of course I’ll get her.’’

 

Steve can’t breathe. He is absolutely terrified. He feels tears streaming down his face, and across the room Sam is looking at him, quite concerned.

 

_‘’We advise you to pick up his daughter now, and explain the situation. Someone will call once we have further updates on Barnes’ health, and when you can visit. Thank you.’’_ The woman says and hangs up.

 

Steve sits in shock for a few moments. What is he going to tell Alia? That her father’s life is in danger, and she might become an orphan?

 

Steve’s heart is beating a mile a minute. He just hopes he doesn’t lose Bucky. He wouldn’t be able to handle it.

 

\---

 

Steve drives as fast as he’s allowed to the school. He got the rest of the day off, thank god his boss likes him.

 

‘’Dad, what’s going on?’’ Carter asks as he and Alia climb into the backseat.

 

‘’I can’t explain it, not here.’’ Steve says and Carter and Alia look at each other with the same confused expression.

 

When they get home Steve sits them both down on the couch.

 

‘’Alia, it’s your dad.’’ Steve sighs. She smiles.

 

‘’He was injured at work, and he’s currently at the hospital. Doctors are trying to help him, but they don’t know if he’ll be okay.’’

 

The look on Alia’s face shatters Steve’s heart into a million pieces. She looks so heartbroken.

 

‘’I’m sorry.’’ Steve whispers.

 

Alia doesn’t say anything, so Steve pulls her into a hug, and she cries into his shoulder. Steve reaches out and wraps his arm around Carter as well.

 

\---

 

Alia falls asleep, exhausted from crying. Carter sleeps as well. The silence in the house gnaws at Steve’s insides, he hates being alone with his thoughts. He has to be hopeful, for Alia’s sake, but he doesn’t know if he can. He’s been in a situation too similar to this, with his mother.

 

The thought of Bucky in a hospital room, a bunch of tubes connected to his body and doctors performing whatever surgery he had to undergo is enough to bring Steve to tears. He’s hardly ever been this scared before.

 

He hears a small pair of feet behind him. Steve quickly wipes his tears and just hopes that he doesn’t look like he’s been crying, though he most likely does.

 

It’s Alia. She climbs into Steve’s lap, and lays her head on his chest.

 

‘’Have the doctors called?’’ she mumbles.

 

‘’No, I’m sorry sweetie.’’ Steve feels Alia further hide her face in his chest.

 

‘’I’m scared.’’she says.

 

‘’I am too.’’ Steve whispers.

 

‘’What if daddy dies? Where will I go?’’ Alia very nearly starts crying again.

 

Steve’s breath catches in his throat. He was really hoping she’s more optimistic than he is.

 

‘’I don’t know. But I want you to know you’re always welcome with me and Carter.’’ Steve says.

 

Alia doesn’t say anything.

 

\---

 

Steve gets the phone call at 11PM, when the kids are asleep.

 

The surgery went well, he’s not awake yet but should be awake in a few hours. He’s being taken very good care of by both nurses and doctors, they say. They can come visit tomorrow.

 

Steve sleeps uneasily that night.

 

\---

 

Alia smiles so wide when Steve tells her the good news and she demands they go immediately. Steve doesn’t try to stop her when she runs to put on clothes and shoes, he’s almost as excited as she is.

 

When they arrive at the hospital and get directions to Bucky’s room, Steve can’t help but feel nervous. Does Bucky even want him there? He was acting distant before the accident, it wouldn’t surprise Steve if Bucky asked him to leave. But it would hurt.

 

Steve gently knocks on door number 616, and from the inside he hears a soft ‘’come in.’’

 

 

Steve opens the door and there is Bucky. He’s dressed in all white, with his hair flowing down to his shoulders. He has a white bandage wrapped around his head, a few cuts on his face and the hospital gown and blanket cover the rest.

 

‘’Daddy!’’ Alia exclaims and runs to her father’s side.

 

‘’Sweet pea!’’ he smiles and wraps his arms aound her, as far as he can reach. He kisses her forehead, and Steve can see a few tears leak out of his eyes.

 

‘’You scared me. Don’t do that again.’’ Alia mutters.

 

Bucky simply pulls her closer.

 

When Bucky and Alia pull away Bucky notices Carter and Steve. Steve expects his expression to turn to disappointment, but it doesn’t. Bucky smiles just as wide.

 

‘’Steve! Good to see you.’’ he says, motioning for them to come closer. ‘’How are you, Carter?’’

 

Carter wraps his arms around Bucky, and Bucky smiles and hugs him back.

 

‘’I missed you.’’ Carter says. Bucky chuckles and ruffles his hair.

 

‘’ _We_ missed you.’’ Steve says.

 

Bucky looks at him, almost in disbelief, but doesn’t say anything.

 

They stay in Bucky’s room for a few hours, Alia and Carter fill him in on everything he missed in those hours he was away, from their favorite cartoons to what they ate for breakfast. Bucky listens intently to both of them, only looking away to steal a few glances in Steve’s direction, and their eyes always meet.

 

Bucky asks the kids to go outside for a while, to Steve’s surprise. They comply, another thing that surprises Steve.

 

When they leave, Bucky pats the chair next to him. Steve hesitantly takes a seat.

 

‘’Thank you, first of all. I truly appreciate you taking care of Alia for me.’’ Bucky says.

 

‘’It was no trouble, really.’’ Steve replies, sincerely. ‘’What happened?’’

 

Bucky sighs. ‘’Part of a roof fell on me in a fire. If they had discovered me a few minutes, I’d probably have died. I was saved with only a concussion, a few of my ribs completely cracked and my leg is broken. I also got severe cyanide poisoning.’’

 

‘’Only.’’ Steve scoffs. Bucky grins.

 

‘’How long will you take to recover?’’ Steve asks.

 

‘’They need to keep a close eye on my ribs, so I’ll be in the hospital for at least another two weeks. And who knows how long the at-home recovery time will be.’’ Bucky sighs.

 

‘’Does Alia have a place to stay?’’ Steve asks. Bucky shakes his head. ‘’She can stay with us.’’ Steve smiles at Bucky. ‘’If you trust me.’’

 

Bucky looks at Steve, almost in disbelief. ‘’Thank you so much Steve, but you really don’t-‘’

 

‘’I _want_ to.’’ Steve cuts him off. Bucky smiles incredibly wide, and Steve’s heart flutters.

 

‘’But the at home recovery? What will that be like?’’ Steve continues.

 

‘’I’m _not_ looking forward to that. I’ll have to have someone looking out for me at almost all times, because I can’t put too much of a strain on myself.’’ Bucky whines.

 

‘’You could stay with us.’’ Steve hears himself say.

 

_Fuck._ He definitely overstepped it now. He definitely should _not_ have said that. But words can’t be taken back, so all he has to do is wait for Bucky’s answer.

 

‘’Seriously?’’ Bucky raises his eyebrows. Steve nods, because although he didn’t intend to say that, he meant it.

 

Bucky breaks into a huge smile, and Steve swears he can see tears in the corners of his eyes. Steve’s heart is so full.

 

‘’How will I ever repay you?’’ Bucky asks.

 

_Being around you is enough payment for me,_ Steve wants to say. But he doesn’t, because he’s already said more than he intended to do, and he has no plans for public embarrassment.

 

Bucky leans his head back and closes his eyes, the edges of his mouth slightly turned upwards. A nurse walks in, and tells Steve that Bucky has to rest now, talking puts enough of a strain on him, and he should leave. Steve does as she says, but before he leaves he takes Bucky’s hand and presses his lips against it. Bucky doesn’t react, and he can hear his soft breathing as he sleeps.

 

He leaves the room and gets the kids. They go to Bucky’s house and gather Alia’s things, and when they get home they find an old bed that Alia fits into, and they place that on the other side of Carter’s bedroom. Neither of them can control their joy.

 

Steve watches them play. They get along so well, it’s a dream. He hasn’t felt this happy in a long time.

 

They eat dinner, lasagna and garlic bread, and Alia and Carter tell Steve about a game they played for hours today. Steve listens to every word and the children notice. The smiles at the dinner table that night are infinite.

 

As Steve reads them a bedtime story and tucks them into bed, one word keeps running through his head.

 

Family. Or fAmyly, as Carter would put it.

 

\---

 

One day in mid December, Steve and the kids arrive at the hospital ready to see Bucky. Steve didn’t think he’d be spending this much time in a hospital ever again, after his mom got sick. He doesn’t like hospitals at all. The air feels so light, too light, but incredibly heavy at the same time. It makes Steve feel sick. Sometimes you could hear faint screaming and crying through the thin walls, and it hurts Steve’s heart every time.

 

When they open the door to Bucky’s room, there’s two people already inside.

 

‘’Grandma! Grandpa!’’ Alia yells when she realizes who they are. Steve’s eyes widen. He didn’t think he’d meet Bucky’s parents so soon, not at all really.

 

‘’There’s my little girl!’’ Bucky’s father smiles and takes her into his arms. both her grandparents smother her with kisses and she giggles.

 

Bucky is somehow a perfect mixture of them both. His mother is beautiful. She has the same beautiful long brown hair as he does. He has his father’s nose and eyes. His father is very good looking too, despite age.

 

‘’Mom, dad, this is Steve. He’s taking care of Alia while I’m here.’’ Bucky gestures to Steve. Steve quickly smiles and goes to shake Bucky’s father’s hand. His handshake is firm, and when Steve gets a closer look, he’s missing a bit of his middle finger.

 

‘’I’m George Barnes.’’ his father smiles. The same smile as Bucky.

 

Steve smiles and nods and takes his mother’s hand. Her nails are painted a bright, beautiful red.

 

‘’Winnifred.’’ she smiles too. ‘’Is this your son, Steve?’’ she smiles at Carter, who tries to hide behind Steve’s legs.

 

‘’Yes, this is my son Carter.’’ he tells them. ‘’Carter, say hello to Mr. and Mrs. Barnes.’’

 

Carter peeks from behind his legs and waves slightly.

 

‘’Carter? Does that mean you’re Alia’s best friend?’’ George kneels down to his height.

 

‘’Yes I am.’’ Carter mumbles.

 

George holds out a hand for him to shake. ‘’I’ve been wanting to meet you for a long time, Carter. Alia tells me you do the best drawings!’’ he smiles.

 

This makes Carter feel a bit more comfortable as he slowly walks up to him and shakes his hand.

 

‘’Is that how you two met? The kids?’’ Winnifred asks Steve.

 

‘’Yes, yes it is.’’ Steve smiles.

 

‘’I’m glad you two get along. Bucky has been kind of lonely.’’ she says and gives Bucky a look as he hugs his daughter tightly. ‘’Do you have a girlfriend?’’ she asks. ‘’or are you and Carter single, like Bucky and Alia?’’

 

Steve was not expecting that at all, and he’s a little taken aback. ‘’I’m uh- I’m single.’’ he manages to muster up a smile.

 

‘’Good. Very good.’’ he hears his mother say as she walks away to tell George something, which Steve can’t quite make out.

 

‘’We um- we can leave, if the family wants a moment alone.’’ Steve hesitantly says.

 

‘’No!’’ Bucky responds almost immediately. ‘’I mean, we don’t mind, right?’’ he mumbles.

 

‘’I don’t!’’ Alia smiles.

 

‘’We’ve had enough private time already, thank you Steve.’’ George smiles reassuringly at him. Steve smiles and nods.

 

‘’So, what are you doing in the city? Bucky tells me you live upstate.’’ Steve asks and sits on the corner of the bed.

 

‘’Christmas! Bucky’s sister lives in the city too and we’re here over the holiday.’’ Winnifred says.

 

‘’Bucky has a sister?’’ Steve wonders out loud. ‘’What’s her name?’’

 

‘’Rebecca! She’s the best!’’ Alia smiles.

 

Bucky smiles and nods at his daughter.

 

‘’Do you have siblings, Steve?’’ George asks.

 

Steve shakes his head. ‘’No, I’m an only child. My father died when I was young and my mother died a few years back.’’

 

The room falls silent. Carter climbs into Steve’s lap.

 

‘’Well- what do you do on Christmas? Are you and Carter alone?’’ Winnifred asks, shocked.

 

‘’Yeah. We just have a nice night in on Christmas Eve and then we open presents in the morning over a nice breakfast.’’ Steve says.

 

‘’But his mother’s family?’’ Winnifred blurts out. Steve’s beginning to feel a little uncomfortable.

 

‘’They live in England, and they rarely visit after she passed away.’’ Steve mumbles.

 

‘’ _Mom._ ’’ Bucky warns.

 

Winnifred looks absolutey horrified. Family is the most important thing to her, that’s for sure.

 

‘’Why don’t you spend Christmas with us?’’ George asks. Alia’s eyes go big.

 

‘’Oh, no I wouldn’t want to intrude-‘’ Steve begins.

 

‘’Nonsense! You’ve done so much for our Bucky and Alia, it’s only logical.’’ Winnifred demands.

 

Steve looks over to Bucky. ‘’is it okay with you?’’ he whispers.

 

Bucky smiles. ‘’You know it is.’’

 

Steve turns to Bucky’s parents, who both have a hopeful expression on their faces.

 

‘’We’d love that, if it’s not too much trouble.’’ he smiles. Carter and Alia erupt into loud cheers. Winnifred and George smile so bright.

 

‘’Of course not! Oh, Rebecca’s going to love you two!’’ she exclaims.

 

\---

 

A few moments later, Bucky’s parents leave and they get a moment alone.

 

‘’Sorry about them. They can be a bit-‘’ Bucky mumbles, ‘’a bit much sometimes. I’m sorry that they asked you about that.’’

 

‘’It’s fine, it really is.’’ Steve reassures him.

 

‘’You didn’t think the Christmas thing was a bit much?’’ Bucky asks.

 

‘’Sure, a bit at first, but I’m glad Carter doesn’t have to spend Christmas alone with just me. He gets really bored of it.’’ Steve says.

 

Bucky smiles and nods. ‘’It’s going to be fun.’’

 

‘’Do you have all your presents yet?’’ Steve asks, in an effort to continue the conversation.

 

‘’Yes I do, and that reminds me, could you maybe drop by my apartment and get them? I know it’s a bit much to ask, but-‘’

 

‘’Of course I can! Are they wrapped?’’ Steve smiles.

 

‘’Yes, I like to be organized.’’ Bucky chuckles.

 

‘’Just let me know when you need them, and I’ll get them.’’ Steve says. ‘’Do you know when you’re out?’’

 

‘’The goal right now is December 20th, and that’s most likely going to go through. I can’t wait.’’ Bucky says. ‘’I started physical therapy yesterday,and getting to stand up, even for a little bit, felt incredible.’’

 

Steve smiles. ‘’We can’t wait.’’

 

\---

 

When Steve enters Bucky and Alia’s place he can’t help but take a look around before locating the carefully wrapped presents. The last time he was here he’d been slightly distracted by Bucky’s presence to fully look at the place.

 

It’s a nice little place. It’s decorated well, Steve didn’t think Bucky was the interior design type. On one wall there’s a large picture of Bucky with what looks like Alia as a baby. He’s holding her like he’s about to toss her into the air and they both have a huge smile on their face. Steve chuckles and moves forward into the apartment.

 

In the living room he’s got a large TV, and plants on both sides. Either they’re fake, or someone’s been watering them for him.

 

He has a large shelf full of movies. Steve instantly notices some of his favorite ones, _Aladdin, 10 Things I Hate About You, My Neighbor Totoro_ , _West Side Story_ and others. He feels like his heart is going to blow out of his chest when he sees _Piglet’s Big Movie_ on the shelf.

 

Bucky seems to be into the same sort of movies as Steve, musicals and rom-coms. Steve’s not sure why but he feels a bit relieved when he realizes that.

 

He sees a door that looks like it leads to a balcony, and his curiosity leads him to open the door and step outside. Immediatey he’s met by  what looks to be some vegetables growing in dirt. Next to them are some empty boxes with tags in them, on them are names of various vegetables and fruits.

 

So Bucky’s a gardener. Steve never would have guessed. He almost turns around to go back inside, but he notices something in the corner of his eye.

 

A tag that says Calla Lilies.

 

Steve and Peggy’s wedding flowers.

 

Steve’s heart stops. What if it means something? Bucky seems to know his flowers, and he’s seen pictures from Steve’s wedding where the flowers were clearly on display. The tag looks new, newer than the others.

 

Steve shakes his head. He’s got to be overthinking stuff. It’s probably just a coincidence. Calla Lilies _are_ a popular type of flower.

 

He continues on to the kitchen, where he’d been before. It’s spacious, and Steve can see Bucky’s various appliances on the counter, stuff that intimidates Steve a hell of a lot.

 

He sees Carter’s familiar scribble on the fridge. When he gets closer, it’s an adorable drawing of him and Alia holding hands. Steve smirks.

 

His kid is fucking adorable.

 

He notices a small polaroid picture on the fridge. It looks to be Bucky with his arms around a red-haired woman. She’s beautiful. Their mouths are stretched in a smile.

 

Was that Alia’s mother? Bucky had said she died in childbirth. Steve can see the resemblance, although Alia looks more like her dad.

 

When he _finally_ decides it’s time to do what he was asked to do, get presents, he locates a small study next to Alia’s room. When he opens, he is greeted by a flood of presents. Steve’s never seen so many before.

 

He goes to put them into a bag, but a particular one catches his eye. It’s small and soft, but it seems to have something harder on the inside. The tag on it says: _To Steve, from your friend Bucky._

 

Steve did not get Bucky a present. He didn’t even think about it. Now he feels bad. He’s probably gotten Carter a present, but marked it as _from Alia,_ because he knows how to do stuff like that.

 

Steve has to get him a present, and Alia too.

 

 

Steve has never had a lot of people to buy presents for, and he doesn’t know how to do it. He gets Carter presents, Peggy’s parents if he remembers, and he usually gets Sam a little something. Those are all people he knows very well, but Bucky still seems like a puzzle to him. Today’s trip has revealed some stuff he didn’t know, but he still feels miles away.

 

Steve is still so, _confused_ , about Bucky. One day it feels like they’re flirting, then the next they’re just dads whose kids are best friends. Steve just wants to know Bucky’s _true_ feelings about him, and he doesn’t know how he’s going to find out. Maybe he never will.

 

He decides to get out, and go get Carter and Alia. Finding presents is a challenge, but his main concern now is to get a mountain of presents past Carter and Alia’s eagle eyes.

 

He’s incredibly tempted to text Bucky and tell him that he found the presents. But that would be ridiculous, since Bucky gave him clear instructions and he knows Steve isn’t dumb.

 

Something in Steve just wants to talk to him. He ultimately decides to not do anything, they’re not there yet in their friendship.

 

Or whatever this is.

 

\---

 

After a ton of thinking, Steve orders a soft and fluffy blue sweater for Bucky and Lego for Alia. Finding something for her was easy, he just asked Carter, but Bucky was a bit harder to buy for. He didn’t know Bucky as well as he would like, so he had to go through a ton of gift guides, more than he’d care to admit.

 

He ultimately decided on a cream colored knit blanket, because who doesn’t love a good blanket?

 

He received and wrapped the gifts just in time for Bucky to get out of the hospital.

 

Stve tried to bake a cake,with Carter and Alia’s help, but it didn’t go well. Needless to say, Steve will be buying his cakes from now on. When Bucky gets through the front door, with Steve’s help, he’s greeted by Alia and Carter’s smiles and a cake that looks like someone sat on it. Alia wrote _welcome home dad!_ on it with bright green icing. Steve wasn’t sure about the green with the brown chocolate frosting, but he ignore it to the best of his abilities.

 

‘’Thank you sweet pea! Oh, I’ve missed you so much!’’ Bucky says as he wraps his arms around Alia. ‘’Let’s go eat some cake!’’ he takes the kids’ hands and stumbles to the kitchen.

 

When he takes his first bite, he makes a face and looks at Steve, who gives him an apologetic look and chuckles.

 

‘’What do you think dad?’’ Alia asks enthusiastically.

 

‘’Oh, I love it! Did you help to make it?’’ he lies straight through his teeth. Alia nods proudly and takes a huge bite, and Steve is sure that bite was 90% frosting.

 

Once the kids have eaten their cake, they leave the room, and bucky turns to face Steve.

 

‘’I’ve missed you all. Thank you so much for letting me stay, it means a lot.’’ he says sincerely. Steve smiles.

 

‘’Listen, about this whole situation. I realized yesterday that I don’t have an extra bed, so I’m going to let you sleep in my bed and I’ll sleep on the couch.’’ Steve says.

 

‘’Won’t that ruin your back? I don’t mind sleeping in the same bed.’’ Bucky says, concerned.

 

Steve shrugs. ‘’It’s a good couch.’’

 

Bucky chuckles. ‘’Whatever you say, pal.’’

 

Truth is, Steve would love to sleep in the same bed as Bucky, but he doesn’t know how he’d handle himself. Knowing Bucky is in the bed next to him but he can’t do anything would be enough to send him over the edge.

 

\---

 

The next few days go by smoothly, Bucky settles in and stays home while Steve’s at work and Carter and Alia are at school.

 

Christmas break rolls around, and now it’s four days to Christmas. Carter and Alia are buzzing with excitement, especially since Steve agreed to get a tree even though they won’t be spending Christmas at home.

 

‘’Dad! we have to get a really big one!’’ Carter exclaims as they enter the tree sale. ‘’Like that one!’’ he points at a tree that looks like it’s over two feet taller than Steve, and Steve is a tall man. Steve laughs and steers him in the direction of the smaller trees, but those are all around Steve’s height.

 

Carter finally settles on a nice tall tree with thick branches, and they team up to fit it into the car.

 

‘’Alia and Bucky are gonna love it, right?’’ Steve smiles at Carter who nods excitedly.

 

Alia just about loses her mind when she sees how big the tree is.

 

Steve puts the lights in the tree, faster than he’s ever done it, but not fast enough for Carter and Alia. They yell at hm whenever he puts his arms down to rest, and when he allows them to start, it’s like a tornado in the living room.

 

‘’Kids! It’s not a competition!’’ Bucky laughs as Alia rushes past him to grab a red bauble.

 

‘’I know, but I’m winning.’’ Carter grins.

 

‘’No you’re not!’’ Alia yells.

 

The kids finish decorating and it looks interesting to say the least. There’s a lot of empty spots and crowded spots, but something about it is charming and adorable and Steve decides to leave it.

 

He makes them all hot chocolate and they curl up on the couch to watch a movie. Carter and Alia pick _Piglet’s Big Movie_ , to Steve’s delight. Carter curls up to Steve’s side and Steve puts his arm around him, Bucky and Alia do the same.

 

Steve is the only one who stays awake throughout the whole movie, and hes glad, because he tends to shed a few tears towards the end of the movie. He slowly gets up from under Carter, who somehow managed to wrap his entire body around Steve. When he turns around to look at them, he audibly aw’s.

 

Bucky and Alia are hugging and they’re all fast asleep. Steve decides to leave them to it and get started on dinner. He’s not a fantastic cook, but one thing he can count on is meatloaf. He’s experimented with a couple recipes and he’s quite confident he’s come up with the perfect recipe. He decides to whip up some mashed potatoes as well.

 

As he puts the meatloaf in the oven and gets ready to make the mash, he hears someone walk into the kitchen.

 

Bucky smiles sheepishly at him as he turns around and leans against the counter.

 

‘’Have a good sleep?’’ Steve jokes.

 

‘’Wonderful, thank you.’’ Bucky smiles at him. ‘’What are you making?’’

 

‘’Meatloaf and mashed potato.’’ Steve says and places potatoes into a pot.

 

‘’Sounds great.’’ Bucky says. Steve smiles at him.

 

‘’So, when I went into you apartment to get the gifts, I couldn’t help but notice you have an entire garden on your balcony. I didn’t think you’d be the gardening type.’’ Steve continues the conversation.

 

Bucky laughs. ‘’It’s relaxing, more relaxing than you’d expect.’’

 

‘’Taking care of Carter’s life is enough for me, I don’t need multiple plants too.’’ Steve smiles.

 

He turns to face Bucky who’s biting his lip and looking at Steve. He quickly turns away.

 

‘’It’s mostly just waiting, and watering them once a day. Not that difficult. Alia helps me.’’ he says.

 

‘’I’m more for the art.’’ Steve says.

 

‘’You know, I still haven’t seen like, a _real_ piece of art you’ve done. I’d love if you could show me.’’ Bucky says quietly.

 

Steve freezes for a second. His art is quite personal, the art he doesn’t do for work but for his personal enjoyment. Normally he’d just show people his ‘’work’’ art but he wants to show Bucky his _real_ art. He’s been working on an oil painting of the view outside his kitchen window, but with little touches that relate to his personal life.

 

Carter can be seen on the street, holding a Piglet plushie. His favorite store from his childhood, that sold superhero comics he’d spend all his money on, can be seen as well. And in one corner there’s Bucky.

 

Steve never meant to draw Bucky, but he ot distracted and before he knew it he’d sketched his long brown locks and perfect face. Steve would be reluctant to show Bucky on any other day, but hell, he’s in a chocolate high and doesn’t care.

 

‘’Sure, I have one in my office I’m working on. Follow me.’’ Steve gestures him out of the kithen. They tip-toe past their (still) sleeping kids and enter Steve’s office.

 

‘’Here it is.’’ Steve whispers.

 

Bucky’s face lights up as he realizes what it is. He takes his time to look at what Steve’s done, carefully examining every detail. Steve watches him intently, scared for his thoughts.

 

After a while Bucky finally speaks. ‘’Steve, this is absolutely incredible. _You’re_ incredible.’’ He smiles at Steve briefly before going back to the painting.

 

He finally notices himself in the bottom right corner on the street.

 

‘’Is- is that me?’’ he mutters and turns to Steve. Steve slowly nods, scared to say any more.

 

‘’I can remove it, if you don’t-‘’ Steve says after a few seconds of silence.

 

‘’No, I love it Steve, I really do.’’ Bucky smiles once again. ‘’Thank you for showing me.’’ he says as they leave Steve’s office.

 

‘’The meatloaf smells fantastic, Steve! I didn’t know you could cook.’’ Bucky says once they reenter the kitchen.

 

‘’I can’t.’’ Steve states. Bucky chuckles.

 

Bucky wakes up the kids and they begin eating.

 

‘’This is delicious, Steve.’’ Bucky says, sincerely.

 

‘’Thank you so  much, I’m sure it’s nothing compared to yours though, you chef.’’ Steve smiles.

 

‘’No, this is way better.’’ Bucky takes another bite. ‘’Could I have the recipe, maybe?’’

 

Steve nods.

 

_Anything for you, sweetheart._

_\---_

 

Steve feels incredibly nervous as they pull up at Bucky’s sister’s house on Christmas Eve. He tries to not let his anxiety show but he’s not sure he’s doing a great job.

 

‘’Hey, you guys!’’ a woman opens the door. She looks so much like Bucky Steve has to do a double take.

 

‘’Hey.’’ Bucky chuckles and wraps his arms tightly around her. ‘’So good to see you.’’

 

‘’I’m glad you’re healing.’’ she hugs him back. ‘’Alia, oh my goodness! I’ve missed you!’’ she says once she pulls away from the hug and opens her arms in Alia’s direction. Alia runs into her arms and hugs her tight. They are clearly a very close family.

 

 ‘’Steve, this is my sister Rebecca. Rebecca, this is my friend Steve.’’ Bucky says.

 

‘’Steve, I’ve heard so much about you! So good to finally meet you!’’ Rebecca shakes his hand.

 

‘’You have?’’ Steve furrows his eyebrows.

 

‘’Of course! Bucky’s told me about you, so has Alia!’’ she smiles at him. Steve looks at Bucky, who is getting more red by the second.

 

‘’Well I’m very glad to meet you, and thank you for letting Carter and I crash on your family time.’’ Steve smiles.

 

‘’Oh please, don’t worry about it.’’ Rebecca says.

 

Carter is, once again, hiding behind Steve’s leg. Rebecca kneels down to Carter’s height and smiles at him.

 

‘’Are you Carter? Welcome! I’m so glad you’re here!’’ she smiles at him, which lets him get out of his shell and smile back.

 

‘’Oh my goodness, I’m a terrible host, come in everyone!’’ Rebecca says. They take off their shoes and coats and Steve fixes Carter up a bit so he looks as good as possible. He wants to make a good impression on these people, even though he’s met his parents already.

 

Yeah, Steve is _definitely_ overthinking things.

 

The living room is full of chatter when they enter, and everyone breaks into a smile when Bucky enters. He greets his parents first, who say hi to Steve and Carter. Bucky introduces Steve to his brother-in-law, Michael, who welcomes him with a big smile on his face. this family is just too sweet.

 

Then it’s the nieces and nephews. Rebecca and Michael have three kids, two boys and one girl. They  all acknowledge Steve but they look preoccupied with toys and whatnot, so Steve decides to leave them alone. Carter stays at his side for the most part, but around ten minutes after they’ve arrived Alia invites him to play with her cousins. He seems a little hesitant at first, but the kids smile at him so he warms up to them.

 

Steve notices the gorgeous smell coming from the kitchen, Rebecca must be cooking Christmas dinner. There’s cookies on the table, probably more than five kinds. Steve has never seen so much enthusiasm for Christmas in his life, and he wishes he had a family like this who all came together to celebrate. He didn’t have much when growing up, Christmas was just him and his mom, eating something a bit nicer than usual and just spending time together. Similar to how it is for him and Carter.

 

A few hours later Rebecca announces that it’s time for dinner, and everyone flocks to the dining room. The table is decorated beautifully, with a roast ham in the middle of the table and multiple side dishes surrounding it.

 

Once everyone is seated and has begun eating the smooth and easy chatter begins again. Everyone is laughing and smiling, and it makes Steve feel warm. The food is delicious, the Barnes family is clearly a family of natural chefs.

 

Bucky is sitting across from Steve, and whenever their eyes meet, Bucky gives him a soft, genuine smile and Steve’s heart flutters every time. Bucky’s family seems like they are interested in him, they want to know about his job, his interests and family. Steve would normally not be open to tellng people he’s just met so many details about his personal life but theres something about them that just makes Steve feel safe and welcome.

 

Steve’s never had a family like this, and he really wishes he did. It’s clear how much everyone genuinely cares about each other and how open and loving they all are.

 

And he can see how truly _happy_ Carter is, and Steve wishes he’d have been able to let Carter have something like this earlier.

 

Everyone finishes eating, after at least two servings, and they return to the living room where the kids get to open a present each before going to bed.

 

‘’Dad! can I open a present too?’’ Carter asks enthusiastically.

 

‘’Of course you can buddy.’’ Steve smiles at him.

 

Bucky sits down next to him. The couch is crowded, so they’re touching from shoulder to knee, and Steve is sure that Bucky also felt the sparks.

 

‘’Sorry about them. They’re incredibly loud sometimes.’’ Bucky says quietly to Steve.

 

‘’No, I love it. I’ve never had anything like this.’’ Steve smiles fondly, and Bucky returns the smile.

 

Watching everyone makes Steve feel emotional, so he goes to the bathroom to try and calm down. He misses his mother and he knows that she would’ve done anything to get to have a Christmas like this, both for him and for her. Steve slightly feels like he doesn’t _deserve_ to be here, he hardly knows these people and has done nothing to win their approval. But, still, these people make him feel a bit happier, even if only for a few hours.

 

Steve splashes some cold water in his face. He feels tears forming in his eyes. He feels like he’s failed as a father, because he wasn’t able to give Carter something like this earlier. There have been countless time’s where Carter has complained about not having family, like his classmates. And even if nothing happens between him and Bucky, he feels like this could at least be somewhat of a family to him.

 

And that makes Steve so incredibly glad.

 

\---

 

‘’Dad! Wake up! It’s Christmas!’’ Carter jumps on top of Steve at the asscrack of dawn, but Steve can hear people outisde their room, so this is most likely standard Christmas morning procedure for them.

 

‘’Merry Christmas buddy.’’ Steve smiles at his impatient son. ‘’Give me a hug.’’

 

Carter hugs his dad quickly and stomps his feet on the floor. ‘’Dad, we gotta go!’’

 

The real reason why Steve doesn’t want to get out of bed is because he doesn’t want Carter to feel like the other kids here have more than him. The tree is surrounded by large presents which Steve can only assume are for the Barnes family and Carter only gets a few presents. Steve doesn’t want Carter to feel like he did, like his family is poor. Or that his few remaining relatives don’t care about him. When they had their Christmas, just the two of them, that wasn’t an issue, but now they’re with a large and loving family who clearly gets each other a lot of presents.

 

But when they enter the living room, Steve’s eyes land on a pile of presents next to a piece of paper with Carter’s name on it. he can see the presents he got for Carter, Bucky and Alia’s present, but there’s some others he doesn’t recognize. When he gets closer and reads the tags his eyes fill with tears.

 

_To Carter, from Rebecca_

_To Carter, from George and Winnifred_

He continues to read the tags and there’s more from Rebecca, Rebecca’s kids and Bucky’s parents. There’s even one written in Alia’s wobbly handwriting.

 

His tears must have been obvious, because he feels a hand squeeze his shoulder. His eyes meet George’s and he smiles at Steve.

 

‘’We didn’t want him to feel left out.’’ George explains when Steve doesn’t say anything, still in shock.

 

‘’There was no need to-‘’ Steve tries to say.

 

‘’ _We know_ , but that doesn’t mean we can’t do it.’’

 

Carter’s eyes have spotted the pile and he lets out a shriek of joy. ‘’Dad! Look, it’s so many presents!’’ he exclaims.

 

‘’I know buddy, look how exciting!’’ Steve smiles.

 

Bucky and Alia join the family and Carter excitedly shows her all his presents he’s opened so far. _Lego_ sets, Disney films, and some books. Steve’s heart is so full, this is what he’s always wanted.

 

‘Merry Christmas.’’ Bucky appears next to him, smiling. When Steve turns to face him he almost has a heart attack, because, _fuck_ , he’s shirtless. Steve has to do his best to maintain eye contact, because he’s not sure what’ going to happen if he looks at Bucky’s stomach for more than a few seconds at a time.

 

‘’Merry Christmas.’’ Steve gulps. ‘’Thank you for Carter’s presents.’’

 

‘’No problem.’’ Bucky grins, and Steve wants nothing more than to kiss his dumb perfect lips.

 

‘’Dad, look what Carter got me!’’ Alia holds a lego set to show her dad. Steve sighs with relief, mostly because she likes the present but also because it’s a distraction from Bucky’s _very_ present abs.

 

‘’Have you told him thank you?’’ Bucky asks. Alia nods and goes to hug Carter tightly.

 

‘’Carter!’’ Steve speaks up. ‘’That present is from me. I want to see what you think!’’ he smiles as Carter goes to pick up the biggest present of the bunch. Steve is relieved that his present is still the largest, otherwise that could result in some tears and confusion from a very emotional five year old.

 

Carter rips the paper to reveal Woody and Buzz Lightyear toys, same size as in the movie. Carter’s eyes widen.

 

‘’Dad, _dad,_ oh my god!’’ Carter says and Steve can see some tears forming.

 

‘’You like it, buddy?’’ he laughs as Carter wraps his arms around Steve and hugs him tight.

 

‘’Dad, _oh my god,_ I love it so much. Thank you!’’ he yells. ‘’Alia, look!’’ he exclaims, back in his litte world.

 

Steve smiles and turns to face Bucky, who’s now wearing a tight tank top. Steve doesn’t know which is worse. On second glance, he also has a present in his hands. His present to Steve.

 

‘’Didn’t think you’d get out of this one, did you?’’ he smiles at Steve. Steve smiles and accepts the present Bucky hands him.

 

‘’You really shouldn’t have-‘’ Steve tries to complain but Bucky silences him.

 

‘’I _know,_ but we do things we don’t have to do when we care about somebody.’’ Bucky smiles softly.

 

Steve sits down on the couch and carefully unwraps the present, his heart beating out of his chest.

 

Inside it is possibly the ugliest shirt Steve has ever seen, and Bucky clearly meant it as a joke, judging by the way he bursts out laughing when Steve looks at it, just trying to figure out what the hell he’s looking at.

 

After he gives up on figuring out what the print is, he picks up the box that fell out of the shirt.

 

It’s a small printer you can hook up to your iPhone to print out any pictures from there. Steve is shocked. These things are _expensive_ , and now he’s very aware of the sweater sitting wrapped up somewhere under the tree.

 

He looks at Bucky in utter shock, and Bucky has a kind of nervous expression on his face, as if Steve wouldn’t like it.

 

‘’Bucky, this is amazing. Thank you so much.’’ Steve says, still in shock. Bucky smiles.

 

‘’Do you like it?’’ he mutters. Steve smiles and nods.

 

‘’It’s awesome.’’ Steve says, inspecting the printer.

 

‘’I got you a present too. It’s nowhere near as good as this one, though.’’ Steve says. Bucky raises his eyebrows.

 

Steve finds the present under the tree and hands it to Bucky. He carefully rips it open, and smiles at the contents. Steve gets lost in his smile, his side profile.

 

‘’Steve, I love it, I really do.’’ Bucky smiles. ‘’It’s so soft.’’

 

Bucky puts the sweater on, and Steve’s heart melts at the sight.

 

‘’It’s wonderful.’’ Bucky smiles again.

 

‘’Yeah?’’ Steve grins.

 

The gap between them is so small, all Steve has to do to get what he’s wanted for so long is lean forward a few inches. And he can see something in Bucky’s eyes, almost like hope.

 

They get a rude awakning when Alia yells at her dad to show him her present from Rebecca. Bucky quickly smiles at Steve and goes to see.

 

Rebecca sits down next to Steve.

 

‘’Merry Christmas.’’ She smiles at him.

 

‘’Merry Christmas.’’ Steve smiles. ‘’Thank you again, for everything.’’

 

‘’It’s no problem.’’ Rebecca says.

 

‘’No, it is. But I’m so grateful you let us be part of this.’’ Steve says and Rebecca grins at him.

 

‘’Who knows, maybe we’ll repeat it next year?’’ she says.

 

Steve and Carter go home a few hours later, stuffed with even more delicious food and the car trunk full of presents. Bucky and Alia are staying with their family a little while longer. When they get home Carter collapses on the couch and Steve can’t help but snap a quick picture, to print out using his new printer from Bucky. 

 

\---

 

Steve and Carter spend New Years alone, Bucky and Alia went upstate with their family. They have a quiet night at home, eat loads of good food and watch movies.

 

Bucky’s recovery goes surprisingly quick, and he’s out of the house by mid January. The day after they went to back to their place Carter complains about how empty the apartment feels, and Steve can’t help but agree.

 

\---

 

 

 

Steve’s phone buzzes, and he immediately picks it up. It’s a text from Bucky.

 

_i forgot some stuff at your place, is it alright if I drop by in a few?_

**of course, see you soon**

 

Steve feels like throwing his phone to the other side of his room.

 

A few minutes later, as promised, Bucky knocks on his door. Steve smiles when he greets him and invites him in.

 

‘’Where’s Carter?’’ Bucky asks.

 

‘’Out with his grandparents. They won’t be back for a while.’’ Steve replies. Bucky raises his eyebrows and smiles.

 

‘’Listen, um, what did you forget? I haven’t seen anything.’’ Steve says and runs his hand through his hair. Bucky’s smile fades.

 

‘’Really? I was sure it was something.’’ he says, confused.

 

‘’You’re welcome to look.’’ Steve gestures. Bucky simply smiles and goes to look.

 

‘’I didn’t find it, sorry to bother you.’’ Bucky mutters as he goes to leave. He stops for a second, almost as if he hopes Steve will say something.

 

‘’See you later?’’ Steve asks, and Bucky nods as he closes the door behind him.

 

Steve goes to lock the door, but before he knows it the door has swung open again.

 

‘’I really don’t understand you. One minute we’re flirting, and you act like you feel something for me, and the next you’re pulling shit like this?’’ Bucky barges in and swinging the door shut. Steve hasn’t moved, so their faces are inches away. ‘’I mean, _god,_ you took care of me for who knows how long! You bought me a fucking _sweater_ for Christmas! That’s not what ‘just friends’ do, Steve-‘’

 

Steve has him pinned against the wall before he can finish.

 

 Bucky lets out a surprised noise, like he didn’t expect this to happen, but he melts into it, and it seems like kissing the other is all they were born to do.

 

Steve knows Bucky’s lips, kissing them is all he’s been able to think about for _months_ , he’s memorized every curve, every crease, every bit of them.

 

But no amount of thinking was enough to prepare him for the way he would _feel_ inside. Bucky’s hand is on the back of his neck, the other on his back- like he’s afraid Steve is going to disappear.

 

Bucky is a _good_ kisser. His lips are pillowy soft, and they move with Steve’s as if in perfect harmony.

 

Steve can’t get enough. His hands travel down, and when they graze Bucky’s lower back he melts further into Steve.

 

‘’You’ve been driving me crazy, you know that?’’ Bucky lets out between breaths. ‘’I’ve been trying to figure out whether you like me since fucking _October_ , you let Alia and I stay with you, and I thought for sure that was something, but I still wasn’t _sure-‘’_

Steve captures his lips for  a second before muttering: ‘’You weren’t sure? I thought the Mickey ears sealed the deal.’’

 

‘’I can’t with you.’’ Bucky chuckles and puts his hand underneath Steve’s shirt. ‘’ _Christ,_ your stomach-‘’

 

‘’ _Bucky._ ’’ Steve moans. He feels Bucky’s pulse racing, his heart beating against his chest. It feels like he’s home.

 

‘’I haven’t been able to sleep because of you, _fuck_ Steve, you have no idea how long I’ve wanted this-‘’ Bucky groans.

 

‘’Okay.’’ Steve mutters and pulls away. Bucky looks desperate, like Steve just took something away from him.

 

‘’Carter could be home soon, and, _fuck,_ there’s nothing I want more than to take you to my room and fuck your brains out, and if I keep kissing you I can’t promise we’ll be clothed when he does come home.’’ Steve says.

 

Bucky makes a face before nodding. ‘’Okay. Cool. No biggie. We have children. we are responsible.’’ he runs his hands through his hair.

 

‘’but you still want-?’’ he turns toward Steve.

 

‘’There’s nothing I want more. Come here.’’ Steve figures a kiss more won’t hurt.

 

‘’But you just-‘’

 

Steve kisses him quiet again. When he pulls away he rests his forehead against Bucky’s.

 

‘’Go home now.’’ Steve smiles.

 

Bucky looks like he’s about to protest, but ultimately decides not to. Steve is relieved, because he’s not sure he would have been able to resist the urge.

 

\---

 

Steve feels like he’s floating on a soft, pink, fluffy cloud for the next few days. Those few minutes (though it felt like hours) with Bucky leave him feeling a high he’s never felt before. Bucky reularly texts him about anything and everything, including many selfies of him and Alia. And selfies of just him.

 

Steve does his best to text back, but he’s not the best with technology. Sam often calls him a grandpa because of his lack of skills. And sometimes he just plain forgets. His students tease him about it too, because he also takes a long time to respond to emails.

 

But he’s starting to react quickly when his phone buzzes, and when it’s not from Bucky there’s a bit of disppointment at the bottom of his stomach.

 

Sometimes they see each other at the kiss & ride at school, and they smile at each other, and Steve wants nothing more than to take him in his arms and kiss him until his lips are raw. And judging from Bucky’s looks and texts, he wants something similar.

 

They sneak a few kisses when they can, but Steve always wants more.

 

He and Bucky have been wanting to go out on a _real_ date soon, just to get a better feeling of what’s going to happen between them. And that’s where the difficulty of being a single dad _really_ settles in.

 

Whenever a night that works for Steve rolls around, Bucky is busy or vice versa. So when Bucky casually mentions that Alia is staying at Rebecca’s house for the night, he enthusiastically asks if Carter can come too. Rebecca says yes, and Steve  nearly takes a leap of joy.

 

_soo- dinner tonight?_ Bucky texts him.

 

**hell yeah**

 

\---

 

Steve picks Bucky up at 7pm sharp. He was nervous about being overdressed but Bucky comes out looking just as dressed up as him, and Steve’s heart rate speeds up a little. He looks abslutely amazing. His long hair is pulled up into a bun, but there are a few strands framing his face. When Bucky has his hair in a bun Steve feels like he might go into cardiac arrest at any moment.

 

‘’Oh thank god, I thought I was overdressed.’’ Bucky smiles when he gets into the car and plants a kiss on Steve’s lips.

 

‘’I got you a rose.’’ Steve smiles sheepishly. ‘’It’s in the backseat, I forgot to get it before you got into the car. I was distracted by your face.’’

 

Bucky chuckles. ‘’God, you’re so cheesy.’’

 

They go to Steve and Carter’s favorite restaurant, where Bucky says he’s never been before. The restaurant is very full, but they get a nice little table by a window. Steve already knows what he’s going to get, his favorite pasta carbonara. Bucky takes a little longer to decide, but he ultimately decides on chicken alfredo.

 

‘’Well, isn’t this a nice little place, huh?’’ Bucky smiles once they’ve ordered.

 

‘’I love this place. Me and Carter go here a lot.’’ Steve says. They sit in silence for a few moments, unsure what to do.

 

‘’You know, we never properly got to know each other. I only know what you’re like around Carter, really.’’ Bucky says.

 

‘’It feels a bit strange, not having the kids around. I’m glad it’s just the two of us, though.’’

 

Bucky smiles and nods. ‘’So, Steve Rogers, tell me about yourself. Something I don’t know.’’

 

Steve raises his eyebrows. ‘’Well, I’m from Brooklyn, my parents both died when I was younger and I was once in the military.’’

 

‘’Really? The military? Not what I expected.’’ Bucky nods.

 

‘’My dad was in the military, and he put a lot of pressure on me to go. He wasn’t a great dad, I’ll say that.’’ Steve says. He can tell Bucky wants to know more, but he doesn’t ask.

 

‘’Well, how about you? What don’t I know about you?’’ Steve asks Bucky.

 

‘’Well, I was named after a president, I speak three languages and I’m also from Brooklyn.’’ Bucky smiles.

 

‘’We had a president named Bucky?’’ Steve asks.

 

‘’James Buchanan. Bucky is my nickname. I’ve never told you that?’’ Bucky raises one eyebrow.

 

‘’Not that I remember. What languages do you speak?’’

 

‘’English, russian and spanish.’’ Bucky says.

 

‘’Russian? That’s cool.’’

 

‘’Yeah, my ex girlfriend was russian. Alia’s mom.’’ Bucky explains. ‘’Alia is named after her, actually. Her full name is Alianovna, which was Natasha’s middle name.’’

 

Steve nods. ‘’It’s a beautiful name.’’

 

When their food arrives, they eat in silence for a little bit. Even though they’ve known each other for so long, this still feels almost just as weird as a first date. Still, the silence isn’t awkward. Just silence.

 

‘’So, Steve, what made you decide to become an art teacher?’’Bucky asks after a few minutes.

 

Steve chuckles. ‘’I never meant to become an art teacher. Art was just a hobby, I was supposed to be a doctor. At least that’s what my dad said. Mom was always supportive of my art, so after my dad died I started taking art classes. I just fell in love, I guess. And I saw an open position at the school, applied, and got the job. I’m so happy in this job, it’s so rewarding.’’

 

Bucky nods. ‘’I could tell when Alia and I picked up Carter at school. I bet the kids love you.’’

 

Steve smiles. ‘’My courses don’t have final exams, maybe that’s why.’’

 

Bucky laughs.

 

\---

 

After that their conversation flows smoothly. Steve feels like five minutes have passed, when in reality it’s been an hour of great conversation with Bucky. They need to get going. Bucky pays, despite Steve’s protests.

 

‘’Uh- where to?’’ Steve asks nervously.

 

‘’Your place?’’ Bucky replies, very quickly.

 

Steve nods and they get into the car. When they arrive at Steve’s place, Bucky kisses Steve as soon as he closes the front door. Steve immediately melts into the kiss, he’s been waiting so long for this. They kiss for a while, but then Bucky moves down to his neck and he finds a sweet spot that makes Steve forget about everything and just focus on Bucky. He lets out a gasp, which makes Bucky smile.

 

‘’Right there, huh?’’ Bucky teases him. Steve can only nod. Steve grabs Bucky’s ass, and he moans.

 

‘’God, I can’t wait to fuck you.’’ Steve whispers and Bucky kisses him deeply. Steve leads him into the bedroom, and closes the door.

 

\---

 

Steve wakes up to Bucky gently caressing his cheek.

 

‘’Thanks for last night. I _really_ enjoyed it.’’ he smiles when Steve opens his eyes. Steve smiles, and pecks his lips.

 

‘’What time is it?’’ Steve asks.

 

‘’10 am. We need to pick up the kids at 12.’’ Bucky puts his hand under his chin and props his elbow up to get a better look at Steve. Steve groans.

 

‘’What are we going to tell the kids? They’re not dumb, they’re gonna catch on sooner or later.’’ Steve says.

 

‘’They’re not dumb, but they’re oblivious. Like you.’’ Bucky smiles.

 

‘’Hey, what’s that supposed to mean?’’ Steve raises his eyebrows and rolls on his side to face Bucky.

 

‘’You’re _so_ oblivious, it’s laughable. Hell, I was heavily flirting with you the first time I came to your house, and you didn’t do anything.’’ Bucky says.

 

Steve is quiet for a bit. ‘’Yeah, I guess that’s a fair point.

 

Bucky laughs. ‘’I’m glad you picked up on the signs eventually.’’

 

Steve kisses Bucky on his cheek and gets up. Bucky sighs as he gets up too. Steve takes a moment to admire Bucky, his stomach, his shoulders, his face. Bringing back fond memories from last night. Bucky turns around to get some clothes, and Steve gets to admire his ass. Before he loses control, he gets a pair of sweatpants and puts them on as Bucky does the same.

 

‘’You have anything to eat here?’’ Bucky asks as he goes to the kitchen.

 

_Me,_ Steve wants to say, but he figures he should eat something nutritious first. Steve grabs his phone and heads to the kitchen where he can already hear Bucky rummaging through the cupboards.

 

‘’Steve, why do you have three boxes of poptarts?’’ Bucky holds up said three boxes with a look of disgust on his face.

 

‘’Carter snuck them into the cart.’’ Steve explains, and although it was true, Steve didn’t protest when he saw Carter do it.

 

‘’They’re so bad for you _and_ Carter, Steve.’’ Bucky smiles and goes to put them in the trash.

 

‘’Don’t use your personal trainer lingo on me.’’ Steve jokes.

 

 

Bucky raises his eyebrows. ‘’Personal trainer lingo? That’s not lingo, that’s common sense. I need to go through all your cupboards one day. How the hell are you so fit with all this trash in your cupboards?’’

 

Steve shrugs. ‘’Fast metabolism.’’

 

Bucky finds pancake mix and decides that’s good enough.

 

‘’Weren’t you just lecturing me on poptarts, sir?’’ Steve jokes.

 

Bucky smirks. ‘’ Shut up.’’

 

Bucky makes them with more effort than Steve has ever even thought of doing. Whipping egg whites? Who does that?

 

Bucky is very concentrated, and when he’s concentrated he bites his lip. Steve’s eyes are fixed on Bucky, and his every move. Every movement is smooth, and Steve is convinced he’d look incredibly stupid doing the same things.

 

When Bucky finally gets a pan and starts cooking the pancakes, Steve’s stomach sounds like a dying whale. But, they smell incredible. Steve is incredily excited. And when he takes his first bite, he’s not disappointed. They’re amazingly fluffy, and there’s so much flavor.

 

‘’You like?’’ Bucky smirks at him.

 

‘’They’re amazing.’’ Steve says through mouthfuls of pancakes and syrup. ‘’Do you always do them this way?’’

 

‘’If I don’t then Alia freaks.’’ Bucky smiles. They finish their food and get fully dressed. Steve drives them to Rebecca’s to pick up the kids at around 12. When Rebecca opens the door she smiles like an absolute maniac, clearly picking up on what happened last night.

 

‘’Morning, gentlemen.’’ she says and raises her eyebrows at Bucky when they walk in.

 

‘’Later.’’ he whispers.

 

‘’Dad!’’ Carter and Alia yell at the same time when Bucky and Steve walk into the living room. Carter runs into his father’s arms, yelling about everything they did.

 

‘’Dad! We watched your favorite! Winnie the Pooh!’’ he yells and Steve feels blood rush to his cheeks.

 

‘’Oh, Winnie the Pooh is your dad’s favorite huh?’’ Bucky smiles at Carter.

 

‘’Yeah! He always cries over Piglet’s Big Movie! Like a baby!’’ Carter exclaims.

 

‘’Does he now?’’ Bucky looks at Steve with a shit eating grin on his face. Steve is never going to live this down.

 

‘’It _is_ a sad movie! You guys are just mean.’’ Alia says.

 

‘’See? Alia and I _understand_ each other.’’ Steve high fives Alia.

 

They gather the kids’ stuff and get them to the car. Steve and Carter drive Alia and Bucky home, though it pains Steve to see him go. Steve wants to kiss Bucky _so_ bad. But a pat on the shoulder has to last, for now.

 

‘’Dad, why did you and Bucky come together to pick us up?’’ Carter asks.

 

Steve chuckles. Oblivious, Bucky had said.

 

\---

 

Steve never liked Valentine’s day after Peggy died. It was all about shoving love in lonely people’s faces. But now he thinks he’s in love, and _oh boy,_ he is ready to shove it in some people’s faces.

 

Steve and Bucky haven’t exactly been _hiding_ their relationship, they just haven’t been flaunting it either. They’re still not sure what to do about their kids. Bucky says they’re definitely overthinking it, but Steve isn’t sure. People don’t even know he’s into men, though he’s known he’s bisexual for a long time.

 

Still, he and Bucky plan a Valentine’s day date, though Carter and Alia will be there as well. They don’t wanna take Valentine’s day away from Rebecca and her husband, or Bucky’s parents. They’re going to have dinner with the kids, and once the kids are asleep, they’re going to have a nice little moment for themselves.

 

Steve and Carter arrive at Bucky and Alia’s, after Steve pretty much had to wrestle with his kid to get him to put on a nice shirt. He looks absolutely adorable.

 

‘’Dad, I don’t get why I have to wear my nice shirt. It’s only dinner.’’ Carter whines.

 

‘’It’s a _nice_ dinner, Carter.’’ Steve pats him on the back as he helps him out of the car.

 

Carter pretends to be upset all the way to the front door, but when Alia opens the door he can’t help but smile. Alia is wearing a cute dress, she looks like a dream. Bucky follows her, and Steve’s breath catches in his throat, as it tends to do when he’s with Bucky.

 

Bucky smiles wide. Steve wants nothing more than to grab him and kiss him all over, but he realizes that would be quite inappropriate with the kids around. He’ll do it later.

 

‘’Distracted by my face again?’’ Bucky smiles.

 

Steve chuckles. ‘’Shut up.’’

 

Steve kisses Bucky deeply once the kids are inside.

 

‘’Happy Valentine’s day.’’ he whispers and rests his forehead against Bucky’s. Bucky smiles and kisses him again.

 

 They walk into the apartment and sit down at the table, and there’s a steaming pot of chili in the middle. It smells incredible.

 

They eat in silence for a few minutes. The cili is delicious, like everything else Bucky makes.

 

‘’Dad? Why did you and Steve stay in the hall for such a long time?’’ Alia asks innocently. Steve’s heart drops to his stomach. Bucky looks at Steve, not knowing what to say. He raises his eyebrows, likely asking whether he should tell them. Steve nods.

 

‘’Kids, we have something to tell you. Steve and I- we’re together.’’ Bucky says, hesitantly.

 

‘’Like dating? You kiss?’’ Carter furrows his eyebrows.

 

‘’Yes, Carter. We kiss.’’ Steve smiles.

 

‘’So we have two dads?’’ Alia asks. Steve’s heart melts at the thought.

 

‘’You could say that, yeah.’’ Bucky says. Alia smiles.

 

‘’That’s awesome! My friend Sophie has two moms!’’ she exclaims.

 

Carter is a bit more quiet after that.

 

‘’What do you think, buddy?’’ Steve smiles at him. 

 

‘’I like Bucky. He’s cool.’’ he says and takes another bite of his chili.

 

‘’I think so too.’’ Steve says and kisses the top of his head.

 

‘’Are we a family?’’ Alia asks.

 

‘’Yes,’’ Bucky smiles at Steve, ‘’We’re family.

 

\---

 

The rest of the night goes by in a breeze. Carter and Alia rejoice in the fact that they are pretty much siblings, and they gush about everything they will do together (‘’We can go to Disneyland, right daddy?’’). Steve is incredibly happy by the time they go to sleep.

 

‘’That went better than expected, huh?’’ Bucky asks on the couch later that night as he rests his head on Steve’s shoulder. Steve puts his arm around Bucky and pulls him closer.

 

‘’It went amazing.’’ Steve kisses the top of Bucky’s head.

 

They watch a movie, though Steve can hardly focus. He keeps thinking about their future. Even though they’ve only been together for around a month, he feels different than he has in all his other relationships. When he’s with Bucky, he just feels so at home. When he’s not with Bucky, he feels like something in him hurts, and that pain only stops when he finally sees Bucky. He feels like he can truly be himself.

 

Steve feels loved when he’s with Bucky. He feels wanted, and appreciated. Bucky listens, and Bucky cares. Steve has noticed he’s been a lot happier since meeting Bucky.

 

Steve knows he loves Bucky. He’s known for a long time, before they even kissed. But he’s scared to say it. Bucky may think it’s too early, and therefore it would fuck up their relationship. But Steve _knows_ the feeling is real, and he just wants to know how Bucky feels.

 

He’s heard stories where people said it too early, and it’s just driven the other person away, which is the exact opposite of what he wants.

 

Now isn’t the right time.

 

\---

 

After a particularly good night with Bucky, Steve strolls into work happier than ever.

 

‘’Ain’t that a rare sight! What’s got you so happy this Tuesday morning?’’ Sam smiles at him when he enters the teacher’s office. Steve opens his mouth, then closes it again. He’s never said it upfront before. He just shrugs.

 

Sam raises his eyebrow. ‘’Something you’re not telling me?’’

 

‘’Uh, you remember Bucky?’’ Steve asks hesitantly.

 

‘’The guy who made your heart beat out of your chest? Yeah, what about him?’’ Sam takes a sip of his coffee.

 

‘’Well-‘’ Steve mumbles.

 

‘’Oh my _god_ , are you-‘’ Sam realizes.

 

Steve nods. Sam grins.

 

‘’I knew it was bound to happen sooner or later. When did it happen?’’

 

‘’A little over a month ago.’’ Steve says.

 

‘’ _Over_ a month ago? And you didn’t tell me?’’

 

‘’Sorry?’’ Steve gets himself a cup of coffee.

 

‘’Who knows?’’ Sam asks.

 

‘’We’re not exactly _hiding_ it, and the kids already know.’’ Steve sits down.

 

Sam nods. ‘’Well, I’m happy for you, buddy.’’ he pats Steve on the back.

 

Steve smiles. ‘’Thanks.’’

 

\---

 

One night in late February Bucky is at Steve’s place for dinner. Steve tries to cook something (emphasis on tried) and catastropically fails. Who knew meat burned so easily?

 

‘’I told you I should’ve taken care of it.’’ Bucky says as they clean up.

 

‘’I wanted to impress you.’’ Steve mutters. Bucky looks into his eyes.

 

‘’What do you mean? You already do, you impress me every day.’’

 

Steve smiles softly. ‘’Really?’’

 

‘’Really.’’ Bucky smiles and kisses him. ‘’Now, I’m going to need you to go to the store so we can actually eat something.’’

 

‘’Sure thing, honey.’’ Steve smiles.

 

Bucky stops in his tracks. ‘’Honey?’’

 

_Fuck_. They’ve entered pet name territory.

 

Steve doesn’t even know if Bucky likes pet names. He’s never asked, and people usually ask before doing stuff. But, it happened, what can you do, right?

 

‘’If you’re okay with it?’’ Steve hesitates.

 

Bucky smiles. ‘’Of course I am, baby.’’

 

That word sends shivers down Steve’s spine. He really does like pet names. He doesn’t even realize he uses them most of the time, it’s a surprise that today was the first time he did. Something about pet names makes him feel more intimate. One thing that Bucky has yet to learn is that using pet names in bed can send Steve way past the edge.

 

Steve rushes to and from the store and in less than an hour Bucky has whipped up a delicious meal. Nights like these are Steve’s favorite. He doesn’t love getting dressed up to go to some formal restaurant when he could be at home. Closer to the bedroom.

 

Bucky’s smile is radiant that night, and Steve knows he would do anything so that he never stops smiling. His smile makes Steve feel warm and fuzzy. His laugh sounds like the stars. When he smiles he gets crinkles around his eyes, and Steve absolutely adores them.

 

After dinner, they curl up on the couch and watch a movie, as they tend to do. Steve is the little spoon this time, and he rests his head on Bucky’s warm chest.

 

Later that night, Bucky learns the truth about pet names.

 

\---

 

Bucky ends up having to work on his birthday, even though it’s a Saturday. After initially being upset, Steve decides to use the time to make something with the kids to surprise him. After secretly browsing the internet for recipes, he settles on a steak with hasselback potatoes on the side, and a cake that has more steps than Steve has ever seen, but he’s willing to accept the challenge. Steve isn’t known for his cooking skills, but go big or go home, right?

 

When he explains the challenge to the kids, they’re more than ready to help. Armed with a long list, they go to the grocery store and buy everything on the list, and more. Steve missed his poptarts. They start the cake as soon as they get home, and Steve immediately regrets everything. He should’ve just bought cake mix.

 

Though he wishes he’d gone for something a little less ambitious, the look on the kids faces as the whole thing comes together is priceless. They’re proud, but a little confused at the same time.

 

‘’Dad, why is there salt in the caramel? Isn’t salt for meat?’’ Carter wonders out loud.

 

Steve shrugs. ‘’I really wish I knew.’’

 

While the cake is in the oven, the kids conveniently need to finish building a lego house, and Steve is stuck with cleaning up. Alia somehow got flour on the ceiling, because apparently that’s possible. After scrubbing and sweeping vigorously, Steve can finally sit down and relax. He’s still a bit on edge because he’s burned more cakes than he’d like to count, but when he gets them out of the oven, they look and smell pretty good.

 

Once they’ve cooled, he coats them in salted caramel frosting and makes it as pretty as he can. Being an artist helps during this stage, because he manages to make simple sprinkles, chocolate, and fruit look somewhat decent. He sticks it in the fridge and wants to call it a day, but a steak awaits in the fridge. He calls on the kids again, mostly for moral support. There’s no way he’s letting them  deal with a hot pan. He decides to let them spread butter on the potatoes, and once they’ve spread more butter than Steve would even consider consuming, they cover them with cheese. Steve can feel his heartbeat slowing down.

 

He gets started on the steak with a knot in his stomach. He’s never successfully cooked a steak in his life. Again, there’s more butter than he’d ever consume, but he figures it’s got to give good flavor. There’s also garlic and rosemary, and he supposed to spoon the butter over the steak? Steve’s very confused, but it smells good, so what the hell. Just as he finishes cooking the steak the door opens. Bucky yells a greeting throughout the house, and the kids run to hug him.

 

‘’Happy birthday, dad!’’ Alia runs into his arms and gives him a big kiss on the cheek. Carter also hugs him tightly.

 

‘’Something smells good.’’ Bucky smiles as he walks into the kitchen and kisses Steve before sitting down at the table.

 

‘’Well, apparently it’s someone’s birthday today, so I tried to cook something up.’’ Steve smiles.

 

‘’And you didn’t burn down the whole place? I’m impressed.’’

 

Steve brings the food to the table, and calls for the kids to come eat. Bucky’s eyes widen since the food clearly looks better than anything Steve has ever done.

 

‘’This looks amazing.’’ Bucky mutters as he piles steak, potatoes and salad onto his plate. When he takes the first bite he lets out a noise that is best described as a moan. Steve raises his eyebrows and chuckles.

 

‘’Steve, this is incredible. Who knew you had it in you?’’ Bucky winks at Steve.

 

‘’I made the potatoes!’’ Carter yells.

 

‘’And they are delicious.’’ Bucky smiles at him.

 

‘’There’s also cake.’’ Steve says as they finish up their meal and Bucky is sat there with his hand on his stomach.

 

‘’Oh, not now. I’m too full to even think about cake.’’ he groans.

 

Steve cleans up, and refuses to let Bucky help him, since it is his birthday.

 

‘’Daddy! I made you a present at school.’’ Alia tells her dad.

 

Bucky raises his eyebrows and smiles. ‘’You did? Can I see?’’

 

Alia hands him a mug, made out of ceramic, and on it she wrote ‘best dad ever’ along with a heart. Bucky’s eyes soften and his lips slightly part in surprise. Alia looks at him in anticipation.

 

‘’Alia, this is amazing, thank you so much sweet pea.’’ Bucky smiles wide and pulls her into a hug, and kisses her cheek. Alia blushes and smiles.

 

‘’I’m never losing this. When you get your first boyfriend or girlfriend I’ll offer them coffe in this mug.’’ Bucky smirks and examines the mug.

 

Steve smiles as Bucky hugs and kisses Alia one more time. Carter tugs on Steve’s shirt, urging him to lean on his knees and listen to his son.

 

‘’I’m sorry I didn’t make you one of those.’’ he whispers. Steve chuckles and pulls him into a hug.

 

‘’Don’t be sorry.’’

 

\---

 

Rebecca goes away for the weekend with her family and, to Steve and Bucky’s surprise, offers to take Carter and Alia too. Of course they say yes, already thinking of ways to spend the weekend just the two of them. When Rebecca arrives at their place on the Friday afternoon she grins at Steve and Bucky before telling the kids to get into their jackets and shoes. She doesn’t need to tell them twice. Alia frantically searches for her favorite pair of light-up sneakers and her denim jacket.

 

‘’Go to the car now! we need to leave quickly!’’ Rebecca looks seriously at them once they are ready. Carter hugs his dad incredibly tight, like he was leaving for a year.

 

‘’I’ll see you on Sunday, buddy, and I’ll call tomorrow. I love you.’’ Steve whispers into his ear.

 

‘’Now, you two have a good time, and use a condom.’’ Rebecca smirks at Steve and Bucky. Bucky turns a bright crimson and hides his face in Steve’s sweater, and he can’t help but laugh.

 

‘’Of course.’’ Steve smiles and raises an eyebrow. Rebecca hugs them goodbye before going to her family in the car. Carter and Alia yell goodbye through an open window, and Steve and Bucky stand in the doorway, waving. When the car is out of sight Steve turns to Bucky.

 

‘’Should we go out to eat, or just stay in?’’

 

Bucky shrugs. ‘’I don’t mind, but I’m leaning towards staying home.’’

 

Steve sees a glint in his eyes, and he knows exactly what Bucky means. He smiles and nods, turning around to walk into their apartment. ‘’Movies and pizza, then?’’

 

Bucky nods eagerly. ‘’You know, I’ve yet to see you cry over _Piglet’s Big Movie.’’_

Steve rolls his eyes. ‘’Fine.’’

 

Bucky grins, and Steve’s heart skips a beat. His hair is up in a bun, and Steve wants to undo it so he can run his fingers through Bucky’s hair while he rests his head on Steve’s lap. Steve loves that kind of intimacy, because he feels full trust in those moments. Steve trusts Bucky more than anyone, and he knows he will always be there. Those moments reassure him that Bucky feels the same way about Steve. Those moments don’t need words, because they’re thinking the same thing. Steve could sit like that for hours, just being near Bucky.

 

‘’You want pepperoni on the pizza, Steve?’’ Bucky yells from the other room.

 

‘’Yeah!’’ Steve yells back and takes a seat on the couch. A few moments Bucky joins him and leans his head on Steve’s shoulder.

 

‘’You’re worried about Carter.’’

 

Steve shrugs. ‘’I mean, yeah, this is the first time he’s gone on a trip without me. I just hope he’ll be okay.’’

 

‘’He will.’’

 

They don’t say much more, they just sit there on the couch until the pizza arrives. Bucky stands up and gets it when they hear the knock on the door. Steve’s stomach rumbles when he walks back into the living room and places the pizza on the table. Steve can’t control himself and grabs a slice before Bucky has handed him a slice.

 

Bucy raises his eyebrows. ‘’Hungry?’’

 

‘’Starving.’’

 

They eat on the couch while watching the children’s movie. Towards the end Steve starts sniffling and he can feel a tear run down his face. Bucky smiles at him and lays his head in his lap, having undone his bun. Steve gives him a pleased smile, before beginning to absentmindedly run his fingers through his hair while they finish the movie. Bucky occasionally sighs with pleasure at the feeling of Steve’s fingers on his scalp. When the credits start running, he sits back up and kisses Steve.

 

‘’You really do cry.’’ He smiles and rests his forehead against Steve’s. Steve silences him with a kiss. Moments later Bucky deepens the kiss, placing his hand on the back of Steve’s neck.

 

‘’Bedroom.’’ Steve mutters into the kiss and Bucky doesn’t need to be told twice. He stands up, takes Steve’s hand and leads him into their shared bedroom. When they’re in there Bucky pins him against the wall in another kiss. Steve’s hands fumble at Bucky’s shirt, trying to take it off. Bucky pulls it over his head, and then repeats the process with Steve’s shirt. Leaving a trail of kisses down Steve’s neck, he stops at a particularly sensitive spot just above his collarbone. Steve moans quietly, leaning his head against the wall. He feels all the blood in his body rushing to his penis. Steve grabs the back of Bucky’s head and tangles his hand in his luscious, long hair. Bucky plants a kiss on his lips before moving lower.

 

He kisses down his chest, sucking briefly on Steve’s now hard nipples. Steve groans, which causes Bucky to smile. Bucky knows exactly what to do to get Steve’s hair to rise. Steve’s hands unzip his pants, and Bucky pulls them down, motioning for Steve to step out of them. Steve obeys, before pulling Bucky into another kiss. Bucky’s lips part, allowing Steve’s tongue to slip inside. Bucky moans once Steve starts sucking on his bottom lip. Steve’s hands find his ass, and he squeezes hard, causing Bucky to whimper under his touch.

 

‘’Need- off.’’ Steve mutters, tugging at Bucky’s pants and underwear. Bucky pulls Steve’s tight-fitting boxers down in one swift motion, followed by Bucky’s own clothes. Steve licks his lips at the sight of him. He pulls Bucky in for one last, tender kiss before beginning to kiss his neck. Bucky throws his head back and moans loudly, fumbling for Steve’s cock and beginning to stroke it gently. Steve gasps at the sudden touch.

 

Bucky pushes him onto the bed, before getting on his knees, still stroking him. Steve leans back onto his elbows, panting with anticipation. Bucky licks his tip teasingly, before going back to simply stroking him, too slowly for Steve’s liking. Steve bucks his hip, urging Bucky to do something more. Bucky chuckles and obeys, taking Steve into his mouth and running his lips up and down his shaft.

 

Steve gasps loudly, summning a satisfied groan from Bucky. Bucky runs his tongue along the underside of Steve’s cock, making Steve shiver.

 

‘’Fuck, Bucky.’’ he moans under his breath and grabs Bucky’s hair, bunching it in his fist. Bucky continues to suck on his dick, and Steve can hardly see clearly. He leans his head back, groaning with pure pleasure.

 

Steve bucks his hips before pulling away, pulling Bucky up onto the bed intending to return the favor. Steve wastes no time, stroking Bucky twice before placing his lips on his quivering shaft. Bucky moans loudly, shuddering under his touch.

 

Steve runs his lips along Bucky’s dick, hollowing out his cheeks and taking it as deep as he can. His eyes meet Bucky’s, who is staring at him absolutely mesmerized. His lips are slightly parted and a beautiful red color. He pants, letting out the occasional groan. Bucky bucks his hips upwards, making Steve chuckle.

 

‘’Turn around,’’ he orders Bucky, who quickly does just that. He sticks his plump ass in the air, and Steve wants nothing more than to grab it and never let go. He grabs lube from the bedside table, and squirts a little bit onto his finger. Spreading Bucky’s cheeks, he runs his finger along his entrance, hearing Bucky take a sharp breath. Steve smirks and inserts his finger.

 

Bucky is tight, and Steve can’t wait to feel him around his dick. Steve begins to move his finger in and out of Bucky, taking great pleasure in Bucky’s sounds. He sticks a second finger in, smirking.

 

After a few minutes, and a third finger, Steve pulls out.

 

‘’I’m ready.’’ Bucky says breathlessly.

 

‘’On your back.’’ Steve says, grabbing the lube and squirting more into his hands. ‘’I want to see you.’’

 

Bucky is one step ahead of him, already knowing Steve would want that. Steve spreads the lube onto his hard cock before positioning himself at Bucky’s entrance. He slides in slowly, seeing a mix of pain and pleasure on Bucky’s face.

 

‘’You okay?’’

 

Bucky nods, urging him to move while biting his lips. Steve starts slowly, sliding in and out. He pulls Bucky’s legs up over his shoulder, giving himself better access. Bucky moans quietly when Steve starts quickening his pace. The room is silent except for their moans, breaths and groans.

 

‘’You’re so hot.’’ Steve groans. He unintentioanlly pulls out and Bucky sits up.

 

‘’On your back.’’ he orders. Steve does as he says, lying down in the middle of the bed. Bucky gets on top of him, slowly sliding down on his cock. He takes a second to get comfortable, before beginning to slide up and down. Steve stares at him, not able to get over how beautiful he looks. Steve puts his hands forward to stroke Bucky’s hard chest, moving his hands down before getting to his butt, aiding him in sliding up and down.

 

‘’Fuck-‘’ Bucky moans breathlessly. ‘’You feel so good, Steve.’’

 

‘’Bucky- I’m- close-‘’ Steve moans loudly.

 

‘’Yes, cum for me, _baby.’’_ Bucky grins, knowing exactly how that word makes Steve’s insides turn with pleasure. He feels pressure in his abdomen, and, _oh god,_ he releases, seeing stars as he bucks his hips up, crying out in pleasure. Bucky rides out his orgasm, smiling sweetly. He gets off of Steve, sitting down beside him. Steve pokes his stomach, motioning for him to lie down before gragbing his cock and slowly stroking. Bucky’s breathing quickens again, and Steve can tell he’s about to cum. Steve licks the tip of Bucky’s penis before sliding his lips down. He feels Bucky’s fingers tangle in his hair as he bucks his hips, pushing Steve’s lips further down. Steve pulls his lips off just before Bucky cums, spraying thick liquid onto Steve’s face. Steve continues stroking as Bucky finishes his orgasm.

 

Steve grabs a rag to wipe his face before laying down beside Bucky, planting a sweet kiss onto his lips.

 

‘’You never cease to amaze me, Steve.’’ Bucky says, after coming down from his orgasm. Steve grins, resting his head on Bucky’s chest.

 

‘’I love you.’’ Steve breathes before closing his eyes, exhausted.

 

\---

 

The next day Steve woke up, his head resting on a pillow instead of Bucky’s chest. In fact, he can’t see Bucky anywhere. The door is closed, but Steve can hear music coming from the other side. He stands up to pull some sweatpants on before opening the door, the music becoming much more clear. Steve can also hear Bucky’s soft voice quietly singing along. He can smell some delicious food being made in the kitchen and his stomach rumbles at the thought.

 

Bucky doesn’t stop singing once Steve enters the kitchen, wrapping his arms around him from the back and kissing his cheek.

 

‘’How are you?’’ Steve leans against the counter.

 

‘’Sore.’’ Bucky smiles, getting a chuckle and blush from Steve.

 

‘’What time is it?’’ Steve asks, suddenly aware of how bright it is outside.

 

‘’11 am. You slept pretty hard.’’ Bucky states, flipping a pancake. Steve rubs his eyes. He hasn’t slept that long and good in forever.

 

‘’I haven’t been awake for long.’’ Bucky tells him, sensing the question Steve was about to ask.

 

‘’Long enough to do all this.’’ Steve gestures to the various plates on the kitchen counter, containing fruits, eggs, bacon, pancakes, and more.

 

Bucky scoffs. ‘’It’s nothing.’’

 

He flips the last pancake on top of the stack and brings the plate to the table, telling Steve to help him with the other ones. Once they are seated, Bucky hands him a steaming cup of coffee, black. Steve accepts the cup gratefully, and feels warmth spread throughout his whole body once he takes a sip.

 

Bucky smiles at him. A smile that’s reserved for Steve. It’s a small smile, but yet it holds so much emotion and love.

 

‘’Steve- you said something last night.’’

 

Steve’s heart falls into his stomach and he puts down his fork.

 

‘’I did?’’

 

Bucky simply nods, the smile still on his face. ‘’You said- you said you love me.’’

 

Steve’s eyes widen as he remembers. After saying that he had been out like a light. ‘’Well- I- I meant it.’’ he mutters sheepishly.

 

Bucky’s smile spreads wider. ‘’You sure?’’

 

‘’Certain.’’

 

‘’I love you too, Steve.’’ Bucky smiles at him and Steve feels something surge throughout his whole body.

 

‘’I’m sorry that I said it like that.’’ Steve says, taking a bite of eggs.

 

‘’What are you sorry for? I thought it was wonderful.’’

 

‘’Seriously? We just had sex, I say I love you and then I’m knocked out for eleven hours.’’ Steve chuckles.

 

Bucky thinks for a moment. ‘’Well, when you put it like that-‘’

 

Steve bursts out laughing at Bucky’s expression. ‘’In that case- I love you.’’

 

Bucky’s ears go pink and he suddenly seems to take great interest in his eggs. Steve frowns.

 

‘’Is something wrong?’’

 

Bucky moves his eggs around his plate. ‘’I haven’t been in a serious relaionship since Alia was born, and I’m just constantly worried I’m doing it wrong.’’

 

Steve reaches over the table to grab his hand and begins stroking it gently. ‘’You’re the first person I’ve dated for two years. I’m just as clueless as you are.’’

 

Bucky looks up, raising his eyebrows and smiling gently. ‘’You’ve got your shit together, though. I mean, you were married!’’

 

‘’Marriage just makes it official. Relationships take just as much time as marriage.’’

 

Bucky nods.

 

‘’Would you get married again?’’ he mutters under his breath.

 

Steve’s breath hitches. Yes, yes of course he would, if it was to Bucky. Hell, they’d been official for four months but he already knew he was just as serious about this as he’d been about Peggy. Hell, he’d known Bucky was the one when they hung out for the first time. There was always this feeling at the back of his mind, drawing him closer to Bucky, making him crave to be near him, to look at him, touch him, hear him. He hadn’t gotten along so well with anyone in a long time, and he knows that Bucky is the other part of him that he didn’t know he was missing. Bucky makes Steve whole. He listens, he helps, and most importantly, he loves Steve. Steve feels at ease around Bucky.

 

‘’Yes, yes I would.’’ Steve sincerely says, smiling genuinely at Bucky. Bucky blushes.

 

\---

 

That afternoon Steve sits down on the couch with a phone in his hand. He dials Rebecca’s number and takes a nervous breath before hitting the call button. He didn’t expect to be so nervous about calling her to speak to Carter, but he was nervous about what Carter would do. Carter is usually rather homesick and shy, unless he’s with his father.

 

Rebecca picks up the phone, and hands it to Carter when she realizes who it is.

 

‘’Hey dad!’’ Steve hears his son’s excited voice through the phone.

 

‘’Hey buddy! How are you, what are you up to?’’ Steve asks excitedly.

 

‘’Dad, we are having so much fun! We just went swimming, in a _lake!_ It was so cool!’’

 

‘’That’s good to hear. How is staying with Rebecca and her family?’’

 

‘’They’re _awesome!_ Rebecca said I could go on trips with them anytime! Can’t I, dad?’’

 

Steve chuckles. ‘’Of course you can, buddy. Listen, you sound like you’re having so much fun, I’ll talk to you tomorrow?’’

 

‘’Okay! Bye dad!’’

 

‘’Bye buddy.’’ Steve whispers the last part. Bucky appears in the doorway, leaning against the frame.

 

‘’He’ll be fine, Steve.’’

 

Steve looks into Bucky’s steel blue eyes, his expression softening.

 

‘’I know.’’ Steve sighs. ‘’It just feels weird.’’

 

‘’I get it.’’ Bucky sits down next to him. ‘’But you need to let him go sometimes, and live for yourself. You do so much for Carter all the time, you deserve some time to be alone.’’

 

Steve grabs Bucky’s hand and squeezes. ‘’Yeah, I guess.’’

 

Bucky kisses his knuckle. ‘’He loves you more than anything.’’

 

Steve looks at him, and examines his face. He notices new things every time, like how his eyelashes touch the skin beneath his eyes when he blinks, and how he bites his lips when he’s concentrating. He can see flickers of yellow in his eyes, and there’s a small mole in his left eyebrow.

 

‘’I’m so lucky to have you.’’ Steve mutters and pulls Bucky in for a gentle kiss.

 

\---

 

Steve walks into work on Monday with a pep in his step. Greeted by Sam in the office, he sits down with a  smile on his face.

 

‘’Good weekend?’’ Sam asks.

 

Steve nods, turning on his computer and pulling up his lesson plan for the week. ‘’Did you?’’

 

Sam goes a light shade of red. Steve’s eyebrows rise, urging him to tell all.

 

‘’I went on a date.’’ Sam tells him, quite sheepishly.

 

‘’You did?’’ Steve reacts rather loudly, causing everyone in the office to turn their heads. ‘’With who?’’ he leans in, speaking more quietly this time.

 

‘’His name is Rhodey. He was in the air force. Great guy.’’

 

Steve smiles. Sam had been on the scene for a while, but never quite found anyone he liked. ‘’I’m happy for you buddy. You think it might go somewhere?’’

 

Sam shrugs. ‘’I hope so. We’ve gone on a few dates and I’d say it’s going well.’’

 

Steve furrows his eyebrows. ‘’A _few?_ Why am I just hearing this now?’’

 

Sam shrugs. ‘’Never found the right time, I guess.’’

 

Steve pats him on the shoulder. ‘’That makes sense. Ready for upcoming finals?’’

 

Sam sighs deeply. ‘’I’m never ready. I tried to start working on the exam last night but my brain was completely empty so I’ve had to go through loads of older exams. You’re terribly lucky you don’t have to make a new  final exam every semester.’’

 

‘’I have to grade loads of projects and assignments.’’ Steve reminds him.

 

Sam chuckles. ‘’Touché. Speaking of dating, I’ve yet to meet your man.’’

 

‘’That’s true. Maybe come for dinner this weekend?’’

 

Sam nods with a smile.

 

\---

 

 

Steve waltzes into his classroom just a moment before the bell rings, cheerfully greeting his sophomore class. His class is a bit less happy than Steve is. At least two students are sleeping and a few others hardly look conscious.

 

‘’Have a good weekend guys?’’ Steve asks, sitting on his desk. The class nods, not ready to speak at 8 am on a Monday morning. ‘’Remember, the deadline for your final projects is drawing near and I won’t accept late hand-ins.’’

 

A girl with curly brown hair sitting in the middle of the classroom raises her hand.

 

‘’Yes, Jackie?’’

 

She blushes a little bit before asking. ‘’Are you- don’t you think you’re a bit happier than you used to be? We’ve all noticed.’’

 

Pink flushes across Steve’s face. He looks down at his feet. ‘’Yes, I am. I’m glad you’ve noticed.’’

 

He smiles at Jackie, who seems satisfied with his answer.

 

‘’Now, I want you all to revisit the work we did on color theory. I want you to continue mixing colors, using only primary colors, black and white. I will hand out sheets of paper with a template where you will first draw in the three primary colors, then the colors you have mixed. Make sure to stay within the lines, craftmanship counts. Label everything.’’

 

Steve hands the sheets of paper to everyone in the class, and then he sits down at his desk. For a few moments he sits in silence, watching his class get to work at various speeds. The phone rings, and he picks it up quickly.

 

‘’Hey baby.’’ Bucky speaks through the phone.

 

A large grin spreads across Steve’s face. ‘’Hey, how are you?’’

 

‘’Fantastic.’’ Steve can hear Bucky’s smile through the phone. ‘’Listen, it looks like I’ll be working late today, and then I have a client to meet at the gym.

 

‘’Okay.’’ Steve nods. ‘’I’ll pick up the kids and do my best to make dinner.’’

 

‘’Great. See you tonight.’’

 

‘’Bye, love you.’’ Steve says and hangs up the phone. When he looks up, he can see his entire class looking at him with a smirk on their faces. Steve blushes again.

 

‘’Back to work, everyone.’’

 

\---

 

Steve enters their place at four pm, with the kids in tow. Despite spending all day everyday together, their lovely kids can still always find something new to talk about. Today’s subject had been how planes work. Steve had to listen to them speculate all the way from the school to the grocery store and all the way home. He will never understand how kids can talk forever and never grow tired.

 

‘’Backpacks into your rooms.’’ he says once they’ve removed their shoes. Steve walks into the kitchen, placing the two bags on the counter. All he wants to do is lie down on his couch with a good book and not stand up for a few hours. But he has dinner to cook, and assignments to grade, so that won’t be happening anytime soon, much to Steve’s dismay.

 

‘’When will daddy come home?’’ Alia enters the kitchen.

 

‘’He has to work late, so I’m afraid it might be after you fall asleep.’’ Steve tells her. Alia nods, taking a seat at the table.

 

‘’Dad, I’m hungry.’’ Carter whines as he sits down next to Alia. Steve stifles the urge to say ‘’hi hungry, I’m dad’’ and instead hands the kids sliced up apples from the fridge and puts peanut butter in a bowl.

 

‘’Any homework today?’’

 

Carter groans. ‘’Yeah.’’

 

‘’You should get that out of the way first, then you have until you go to sleep to play.’’ Steve points out.

 

‘’I guess.’’ Alia huffs.

 

After the kids finish their snacks they go to their room to do their homework, leaving Steve in peace to put away the groceries. Stifling a yawn, he grabs a box of chocolate milk and finally sits down on the couch. He knows he should do work, but he physically cannot bring himself to do it. Instead he turns on the TV to watch whatever is on at that moment. After browsing the channels for a while he settles on some cooking show. _Might as well try and learn,_ he chuckles to himself. Fighting to keep his eyes open, he leans his head back on a pillow.

 

\---

 

Carter gently nudges Steve.

 

‘’Dad. Dad, wake up.’’

 

‘’What time is it.’’ Steve mumbles.

 

‘’7 pm.’’

 

Steve’s eyes open wide. _Shit._ He’d fallen asleep for three hours and therefore hadn’t made dinner. He rushes to his feet.

 

‘’I’m going to make dinner.’’ Steve stifles a yawn. ‘’Did you finish your homework?’’

 

Carter nods. ‘’Great, go play for a few minutes until dinner is ready.’’ Steve sends him off.

 

Steve cooks a stir fry faster than he ever has and when he calls for the kids to come to dinner, they run into the kitchen at lightning speed.

 

‘’I’m really sorry guys, I just fell asleep.’’

 

‘’It’s fine.’’ Alia reassures him.

 

‘’Listen guys, my friend Sam is coming for dinner this weekend.’’

 

‘’Yay!’’ Carter exclaims. ‘’Sam is the _best!’’_

 

Steve snickers. ‘’He’s excited to see you too.’’

 

‘’Have I met him?’’ Alia questions.

 

‘’I don’t think so. But no need to worry, Sam is a great guy, I’m sure you’ll like him.’’ Steve tells her, shovelling rice and chicken into his mouth.

 

\---

 

On Wednesday in the office Sam waltzes in with a smile on his face.

 

‘’See him again last night?’’ Steve asks. Sam shakes his head.

 

‘’I’m seeing him for lunch.’’ Sam sighs. ‘’I’m picking him up from physio and we’re going to grab something.’’

 

Steve nods. ‘’I’ll have to meet this guy eventually, you know.’’

 

‘’Not before I meet yours.’’ Sam challenges.

 

\---

 

On Friday night Bucky cooks up a nice dinner for Sam. Although Steve would never admit it he’s nervous for how things will go. Sam and Bucky are two of the most important people in his life, and he just hopes they will at least get along.

 

When he hears a knock on the door he rushes to answer it, fixing his shirt on the way.

 

‘’Mr. Rogers.’’ Sam smirks at him once he opens the door.

 

‘’Mr. Wilson.’’ Steve invites him in. Carter comes running and hugs Sam.

 

‘’Hey Carter! How are you doing?’’ Sam pats him on the back.

 

‘’Really good.’’ Carter gives Sam an angelic smile.

 

‘’Bucky, this is my best friend Sam.’’ Steve tells Bucky once he and Sam are both in the kitchen.

 

‘’Nice to meet you, Sam.’’ Bucky smiles and shakes his hand. ‘’Dinner is almost ready.’’

 

Sam gives Bucky a charming smile before turning to Steve and mouthing: ‘’Nice catch.’’

 

Steve blushes at this and motions for Sam to sit down along with the kids before going to get drinks from the fridge. Setting a large jug of water down on the table, he takes a seat inbetween Carter and Alia. Bucky brings a tray of chicken to the table and places it down next to the salad before sitting down inbetween Alia and Sam.

 

‘’So, Bucky, what do you do?’’ Sam asks, not hesitant to start conversation.

 

‘’I’m a personal trainer and firefighter.’’ Bucky smiles at him while placing a portion of salad on Alia’s plate. Sam’s eyes widen slightly before he clears his throat.

 

‘’And this is your daughter?’’ he gestures to Alia.

 

‘’Yes, this is Alia.’’ Bucky answers. Sam gives Alia a warm smile, which she returns. ‘’Sam, are you in a relationship?’’

 

‘’I’m seeing someone, yes.’’ Sam’s face lightens up at the thought of Rhodey. Bucky nods.

 

‘’What’s their name?’’

 

Sam hesitates. ‘’Rhodey.’’

 

Now Bucky’s eyes widen. ‘’You’re _Sam?_ Rhodey’s Sam?’’

 

‘’Clearly.’’ Sam clears his throat.

 

Bucky smiles wide. ‘’I’ve been with him a bit, working with his physical therapist. He’s great.’’

 

‘’Isn’t he?’’ Sam grins.

 

‘’Okay, now I _have_ to meet this guy.’’ Steve butts in.

 

‘’You made me wait four months to meet Bucky, you gon’ wait.’’ Sam shuts him up, causing Bucky and the kids to snicker.

 

After that the conversation starts moving smoothly, and Sam and Bucky seem to get along well, though they seem to be teasing each other in every sentence. Okay, just Sam. But Steve still takes it as a victory. Seeing his favorite people get along rather well makes his heart warm. _Sam has always been snarky,_ Steve thinks to himself after he makes a quite snide comment.

 

Sam stays for a while after dinner, but he leaves around 10 pm, muttering something about papers to grade. Steve knows it’s a lie, Sam finished grading them a week ago. He’s sure he’s off to see Rhodey.

 

‘’So, um- what do you think of Sam?’’ Steve asks nervously. Bucky smiles.

 

‘’He’s a great guy. Not what I expected, but great nonetheless.’’

 

Steve sighs with relief.

 

‘’I could tell how nervous you were, Steve. There’s no need to be. If you like someone I’ll probably like them too.’’ Bucky takes Steve’s hands in his. Steve looks up into Bucky’s gentle eyes, which are always full of love.

 

‘’I’ve yet to meet your friends.’’ Steve points out.

 

‘’That’s true. I’ll invite them over soon, I promise. They just- they don’t know.’’ Bucky whispers the last part.

 

‘’That you’re with a man?’’ Steve fills in the blank. Bucky nods.

 

Steve pulls him into a tight embrace. ‘’Do it at your own speed. I’m not in a hurry.’’

 

Bucky smiles and places his lips on Steve’s. ‘’Have I told you how great you are today?’’

 

Steve grins. ‘’So are you.’’


End file.
